


'Cause I'm A Little Unsteady

by thenewpyt



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Hermione Granger, Eventual Smut, Explicit Language, F/M, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, M/M, Not Epilogue Compliant, Sirius Black Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Slow Burn, The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black, because i have plans for these two, or like semi slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:27:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 27,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25340872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thenewpyt/pseuds/thenewpyt
Summary: When the war is through and people are finally starting to rebuild their lives and the world around them, what will it take for the brightest witch of her age and the heir to the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black to truly find the happiness they both crave? Destiny might have been fulfilled, but post war bliss can only last so long, especially when there's still work to be done.
Relationships: Astoria Greengrass/Draco Malfoy, Hannah Abbott/Neville Longbottom, Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley, Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks, Seamus Finnigan/Dean Thomas, Sirius Black & Hermione Granger, Sirius Black/Hermione Granger
Comments: 43
Kudos: 110





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna be honest, I've been reading a whole heck of a lot of Sirius/Hermione lately and I was inspired. I feel like there's truly so much to explore with these two and I'm excited to see where things go and to see them grow and change in the aftermath of the Battle of Hogwarts. Clearly with Sirius still alive, ya girl is working through her own alternate universe, but I'm stoked to see this story come to life.
> 
> It should be noted that as I'm writing this (and honestly whenever I read Sirius/Hermione or Remus/Hermione tbh) I picture Sebastian Stan as Bucky Barnes for Sirius and Matthew Gray Gubler for Remus and I will probably make edits for this because I'm a sucker for it.
> 
> Also, gonna be honest, there's gonna be no set schedule on uploads. As much as I'd love to tell you it would be weekly, I've got a hamster that lives in my brain that doesn't like to do work on the wheel half the time so, we'll see how uploads look. 
> 
> P.S ya girl does not have a beta so forgive me for any grammatical or continuity errors. i'll do my best to catch them but unfortunately I am but a humble human bean.

Chapter One

**May 2nd, 1998**

Hermione stood with her fingers laced through Ron’s as they watched the scene in front of them, Harry standing over Voldemort’s broken, lifeless body as Sirius watched from the opposite side of the circle that had formed, his eyes never leaving his godson’s face, a look of relief flitted across his features, mixed with what could only be described as a proudness. His stormy gray eyes followed Harry’s movements, waiting to see if he needed to step in. It was over, it was actually over and Hermione felt as if the weight that had been sitting on her chest for the last few years was finally feeling lighter. She took a ragged breath and squeezed Ron’s hand as the sound of shouts from the remaining Death Eaters filled her ears as the Order members and Aurors started firing off stunning spells to keep them from running. 

At the sound of Molly’s sobs, Hermione swiveled her head, Ron’s eyes following her line of vision as he took in the sight of his mother holding Fred to her chest. When Harry and Percy saw him go down, they were certain he was dead, but after Harry deflected a curse from one of the Death Eaters, he’d leaned down to check, eyes finding Percy’s as he gave him a thumbs up before returning into the fray. He’d only been knocked unconscious from the force of the explosion, a nasty bruise running from the side of his head and down under his shirt collar as well as a myriad of cuts marring his face that were no longer bleeding thanks to Madam Pomfrey. As Fred struggled against the strangle hold Molly had him wrapped in, Ron untangled his fingers from Hermione’s hands as he found her eyes, a soft smile on her lips as she shooed him to go join the other Weasley’s who were converging, George not even bothering to hide the tears that were leaving streaks in the dirt caking his face as he slipped an arm around Percy’s shoulder and grinned at his twin. 

Holstering her wand, she stiffened slightly as a hand found her shoulder, a deep sigh slipping from her lips as she realized the hand belonged to Remus Lupin. A man she’d once had a school girl crush on, but who’d somehow become a man she’d found herself leaning on for support over the years, an actual friendship blossoming between the two. Especially after she’d chastised him for staying away from Tonks for so long, the Metamorphmagus now the mother of his child. She’d been unsurprised to see them both in the thick of things, a passing thought for Teddy telling herself he was safe with Andromeda, but hoping and praying to whatever gods were listening that they made it out alive, because Teddy deserved both of his parents. She caught sight of Tonks’ pink hair weaving through the crowd as she checked on survivors, the tears Hermione had been holding back began falling freely as she wrapped her arms around Remus’s waist, his own hands pulling her into his chest as she sobbed. 

She wasn’t sure how long they stood that way, but as she gave one last sniffle, she unhooked her arms and stepped back from the older wizard, dragging the back of her hand across her cheeks roughly to wipe the salty tears from her skin. Her back turned from Harry, she didn’t see the look Sirius was giving her, gray eyes watching as Hermione pulled away from Remus, but Remus did, green eyes matching gray for intensity as he narrowed them in question. Sirius shook his head almost imperceptibly before turning back to Harry who was stepping away from the lifeless form in front of him, Draco’s wand in one hand and the Elder wand in the other when he was absolutely certain Tom Riddle was dead. Remus turned Hermione so she could see Harry as he moved and before she could stop herself, she’d crossed the floor and flung herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck tightly as she gave the first genuine smile that she’d had in months. “You did it. I could absolutely punch you for making us all think you were dead, but you did it.” Harry chuckled, a sound Hermione felt elation at hearing as he wrapped the arm holding Draco’s wand around her waist, squeezing tightly before letting her go. 

Hermione let her arms fall to her side as she watched her best friend move through the crowd, people clapping him on the back or casting furtive glances to the body on the floor, letting herself giggle quietly at the sheepish look he wore. He’d defeated the Dark Lord once again and she knew he didn’t want the spotlight, though nothing would ever be the same for him now that he was The Boy Who Lived, Twice. Feeling the need to do something, she searched for Madam Pomfrey to see if she could help with the wounded, pausing as her heart thudded at the sight of those who’d not survived. The tears prickled in the corners of her eyes as she took in her fallen classmates. Several members of Dumbledore’s Army lay at her feet, Justin Finch-Fletchley and Terry Boot looking as if they were only asleep, though she knew it was a sleep they’d never wake from. 

A head of dark curls caught her attention and she kneeled down next to the body of Romilda Vane, surprised the girl had fought, but knowing she’d sacrificed herself made Hermione forget the issues she’d once had with the younger witch. She pushed down the memory of Lavender being ripped into by Greyback and the thought of Colin’s body being brought in by Oliver Wood as she resumed her search for the healer in question, promising to mourn her classmates properly later. When she spotted the healer, Hermione weaved through the makeshift cots and came to a stop at her side. Chocolate brown eyes found blue eyes filled with a soft determination as Madam Pomfrey gave Hermione a smile. “Madam Pomfrey, is there anything you need me to do?” At the question, Pomfrey waved her wand, several vials of Pain Relief Potion flying through the air, Hermione catching them and tucking them into her arms. “Take those and distribute them. When you need more, reach out to Miss Lovegood and she can assist.” 

Nodding, Hermione started moving up and down the rows, stopping to chat briefly and check in as she distributed the potions to those with greater injuries. She could see the already healing gashes that ran up the arms of an Auror, knowing Madam Pomfrey had been handling the Dittany as well. Her arms no longer weighed down, she found Luna at the end of an aisle, a tray being levitated next to her loaded down with an array of potions. The blonde gave Hermione a loose smile, her voice still as airy as ever, “Madam Pomfrey said you’d be helping, what she neglected to mention is just how many wrackspurts there are. I’m just hoping they don’t confuse people, we definitely don’t need anymore confusion today.” As her friend spoke, Hermione spotted the edge of Luna’s Spectrespecs peeking out of her pocket and she stifled the chortle that threatened to bubble from her lips. 

Hermione jerked when she felt fingers lace through hers, head tilting as she caught the familiar red hair of her best friend, her lips cracking into a smile. Ron inclined his head towards Luna before tugging Hermione closer to him, leaning down to speak. “Harry wants us to meet him out in the courtyard.” Giving Luna an apologetic glance for leaving, the blonde smiled brightly and waved them both off. “Watch out for the Wrackspurts, please.” Ron narrowed his eyes in confusion and Hermione shook her head, tugging him out through the battle damaged walls of the Great Hall and out into the courtyard, seeking out the head of dark hair. When she’d spotted him, she pulled Ron a little harder, ignoring his grumbles of “Not so hard ‘Mione” and “I’m gonna have to see Pomfrey for broken fingers if you don’t ease up.” 

Her feet came to a grinding halt in front of where Harry stood and Ron, who’d only marginally been paying attention, had to wrap his arms around her waist to keep from knocking them both over. “Honestly, Ronald, keep up.” Instead of arguing with her for once in his life, he kept one hand on her waist and rolled his eyes as they both waited for Harry to speak. Harry only gave the hand on Hermione’s waist a passing glance before holding up his broken wand, the two pieces sparking as the magic crackled. Hermione’s eyebrows knitted together as she realized he was holding the Elder wand still. Harry spoke, eyes dancing as he realized what he could use the Elder wand for, “I plan on making sure this wand goes back to Dumbledore, with a few extra security wards for good measure, but I figured I could at least get one good use out of it before I let it go.” He stretched out his palm, the broken wand pieces seeming to dance as he waved the Elder wand in their direction, the pieces joining again forcefully as bits of stray magic shot out, causing Hermione to let out a squeal. 

At the incredulous looks on both Harry and Ron’s faces, Hermione looked sheepish, chuckling quietly. Compared to everything they’d gone through just today, squealing over unexpected magic was a little bit ridiculous, even she could admit that. “Don’t look at me like that, I’m bound to be a bit jumpy.” Hermione cast her eyes down toward Harry’s pocket where she could see the edge of Draco’s wand sticking out. “What are you gonna do with Malfoy’s wand?” Harry pocketed the Elder wand and clutched his own tightly, running a hand over the stubble on his chin. “I hadn’t actually thought about it. The Aurors arrested Lucius Malfoy last I saw, but I don’t know what they’ll do with Malfoy, so I don’t know if I should return his wand to him, or give it to Kingsley.” 

Ron’s grip tightened on Hermione’s hip, and she couldn’t ignore the warmth she felt radiating from her skin, cheeks tinged pink as he spoke thoughtfully, “The little ferret did try to convince the Death Eaters to take pity on him…” his words trailing off as Harry sighed. “His mom did lie to Voldemort and say I was dead when she knew I wasn’t though. I could just give it to him and if the Auror’s decide something different, that’s on them.” The trio made their way back inside, Harry pausing in front of Draco and Narcissa before fishing the wand out of his pocket and holding it out towards the youngest Malfoy who took it hesitantly and inclined his head without fully making eye contact. 

The three of them surveyed the damage as they moved through the crowd of people, each stopping as they were asked questions or offered words of congratulations. It took them much longer than anticipated to make it back to where the rest of the Weasley’s were crowded around Fred who was no longer looking quite as ashen as he had before, Sirius, Tonks and Remus standing off to the side and conversing quietly amongst themselves. Sirius’s eyes found Hermione’s first, glancing down and quirking an eyebrow at the way Ron was touching her, Hermione’s cheeks tinged pink once more before she broke their eye contact. He gave Harry a warm smile, failing to acknowledge Ron which Hermione decided not to comment on, figuring he meant nothing by it. 

Sirius spoke, directing his words towards the three of them, Remus sighing as Tonks wrapped her arm around his waist and scooted closer, their bodies touching as she leaned her head on his shoulder. “The Auror’s took the body to the Ministry to be dealt with and they’ve carted the remaining Death Eaters off to Azkaban to await trial.” “Good, hopefully with Kingsley at the helm, things will actually get accomplished as they should.” Harry’s words were coated in a thick layer of distaste, something that maybe now the war was through he could work through as they rebuilt the world around them. Sirius let out a chuckle devoid of mirth at his godson’s words, “Before I even think about what Kingsley will do, I need a drink… or ten.” 

The rest of the day was a whirlwind as they helped the wounded, some who needed to be taken to St Mungos for further assistance but in dealing with the fallen, Hermione deferred to the Order members and Auror’s who stepped in to handle things. She didn’t think she could stomach seeing anymore death today, or anytime soon and while she recognized it was a privilege to make that choice, it was one she needed to make. Eventually when the only people left at the castle were those closest to Harry, they’d all made their way out far enough onto the grounds to disapparate, ending up at the Burrow where Molly busied herself in the kitchen, fixing a feast to feed the group who all realized just how long it had been since any one of them had had a proper meal. 

\--

Hermione curled up on the squishy sofa in the Weasley’s living room, feet tucked up underneath her as she held the mug of tea in her palms, staring into the flames of the fire that, given it was May, wasn’t needed but it gave her something to lose herself in for a little while. She wasn’t sure how to feel, knowing they’d won the war, but she felt almost _empty_ , like every purpose she’d had was completed and now she was stuck spinning in limbo. She was brought out of her reverie at the feel of the cushions next to her sinking, indicating she was no longer alone. She pulled her gaze away from the flames and realized it was Sirius who’d occupied the space next to her, a flask in his hands of which she could only assume was full of firewhiskey. “You’re being awfully quiet, kitten.” 

She let out a chuckle that came more forcefully out of her nose than she’d anticipated before releasing one of her hands from the teacup, reaching across to snag Sirius’ flask before bringing it to her lips and taking a swig. She winced at the burn, face scrunched up as she passed it back, ignoring the smirk on Sirius’s lips that made her heart beat a little more erratically than she would have liked, especially knowing his Animagus hearing could pick up on it if he were paying attention. Whatever she was feeling was not something she wanted to worry about, especially not when she was certain she and Ron were exploring more than just a friendship. They all knew she wasn’t the biggest fan of firewhiskey, but she couldn’t deny that it gave her a warmth in her belly that neither the fire or tea could offer. “I’m just happy you all made it. The entire day I was so focused on helping Harry that I could only spare passing thoughts for anyone else, but I don’t know what I would have done if I had lost any of you.” Sirius’s eyes looked a little stormier in the glow of the firelight but his face was solemn as he watched her, catching the slight hitch in her breath that he knew meant she was trying not to cry. 

“We’re all just fine, kitten. You don’t have to worry about it now. You haven’t lost any of us and you won’t.” He extended his hand like he wanted to touch her, but instead held out the flask once more, nodding as she shook her head. “I did actually come over for a reason.” The solemn look on his face was quickly replaced with his usual grin and it made Hermione mirror it with her own. “Yeah? And what reason is that?” She tapped the edge of the teacup with her wand, warming the tea back up and taking a sip, curiosity taking hold. He took a swig from the flask before slipping it into the pocket of his leather jacket, shifting so he was facing her fully. “I already asked Harry, but with you guys being back for good and not gallivanting all over the country looking for horcruxes, you need a place to stay. And I wanted to ask if you would officially move into Grimmauld Place with Harry and I.” He paused, not wanting to stir up unwanted memories at the mention of her parents who he knew were living safely in Australia, unaware of the fact that Hermione even existed. 

“Wait, really? Sirius, I would love to, I… You know I don’t have a home to go back to, not anymore at least, so being with you and Harry would be -nice.” Hermione knew she’d never get her parents back, not with how strong her Obliviation spell had to be, so knowing she’d still have a place to stay made her feel less weighted down. She knew she was always welcome at the Burrow but she could never impose on the Weasley’s like that and she’d had enough conversations with Sirius in the kitchen of Number Twelve to know he loved having people around to bring a light to a place that once held such darkness for him. Before he could say anything else, a shadow fell across the two of them and Hermione looked up, smiling as Ron spoke, sounding a little nervous, his words quiet. “Um, ‘Mione, will you come take a walk with me?” “I’d love to.” She set her cup down on the end table and uncurled her legs, steadying herself as the blood rushed to her feet after sitting for so long. As she turned to go, she laid a hand on Sirius’ thigh and gave him a warm smile, “Thank you, I’m forever grateful for you.” He nodded as she left, his eyes catching the movement as the youngest Weasley boy slipped his fingers through hers, leading her out the door before Molly could catch them. 

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, fingers tangling in the curls as he pulled the flask out his jacket with his free hand, holding it to his lips and relishing in the burn as it slid down his throat. If you asked him what was going through his mind at that very moment, he’d tell you he had no fucking idea. 

\--

Hermione let Ron lead her out the doors, casting a furtive glance back at Sirius before eyeing Mrs Weasley, thankful she was distracted by her fussing over Fred who looked about ready to bolt despite his near death experience. They’d only made it so far into the garden before Ron had her back up against the side of the burrow, fingers in her hair as his lips crashed against hers in a bruising kiss, putting everything they’d gone through in the last few months into it as if she were oxygen and he was drowning. He broke away for a moment, his forehead resting against hers as she brought her fingers to her lips, tingling and swollen to the touch. Surprisingly, as much as Hermione responded to Ron, she felt like something was still missing, though she couldn’t quite pinpoint it. Burying the thought as far into the back of her mind as she could, she curled her fingers through his belt loops and pulled him so he was flush against her, his lips finding hers once more. 

\--

**July 17, 1998**

Hermione was finally starting to feel settled within the walls of Grimmauld Place and it helped immensely that she, Harry and Sirius had really taken the opportunity to deep clean it and rid the house of some of it’s more damning qualities, though they still suffered through the shouts and shrieks and derogatory comments whenever Walburga’s portrait was unleashed from behind the curtains. She’d taken over Sirius’ father's study at his instance, knowing she’d get far more use out of it than he ever would, so she’d spent a few weeks going through the books that covered the walls, unsurprised at the sheer number of books related to dark magic. 

She’d finally found herself putting the finishing touches on the office, having taken it from the cold, lifeless room that it was and breathing life into it. She’d had Neville help her find some plants that would be beneficial but easy to take care of with minimal sunlight and the walls were now a beautiful shade of creamy white, making her feel like she could really call the office hers and not Orion Black’s. She did get a sick sort of satisfaction out of knowing that a Muggle-born was inhabiting the office of a blood purist, a fact Sirius had found delightful. Collapsing onto the newly acquired, second hand squishy couch in the center of the room, she flicked her wand muttering under her breath as her very loved copy of To Kill A Mockingbird landed in her lap. 

Her back against the armrest, she thumbed open the book and settled in, content for the moment. Her contentment was short lived when her ears caught the sound of someone coming through the downstairs Floo and she perked up. She wasn’t too fussed, knowing the wards on the Floo were limited to certain people, but she waited to see who it would be. Her money was on Ron or Ginny, though depending on which Weasley it turned out to be, it would be for two _very_ different reasons. 

After their encounter at the Burrow, Hermione and Ron had taken to frequent, ahem, clandestine meetings whenever they could manage. With Harry off spending time with Ginny before she had to go back to Hogwarts in September and Sirius popping about now that he was officially a free man, Hermione was often alone in the house, a fact that she and Ron made sure to take advantage of. Her only issue with it was that the more time they spent together in sometimes very compromising positions, the more she was starting to realize that whatever feelings she had for Ron were purely friendship. Sure she’d enjoyed the time they spent working out the pent up frustrations they’d both acquired over the years, but she wasn’t entirely sure what they were doing was good for either of them in the long run. 

Lost in her thoughts, she almost missed the heavy footfalls on the stairs that told her it was in fact not the youngest Weasley. As Ron rounded the door frame and into her office, he strode in and flung himself onto the couch with a reckless abandon, grumbling about Percy and his need to kiss up to Kingsley now that he was Minister. “I swear Hermione, it’s like Percy takes one step towards not being an absolute tosser, and two steps back towards git of the century.” She snorted and rolled her eyes, closing the book and setting it down on the coffee table. “But at least he’s started to notice that he has been a prat the last few years? That’s some kind of progress, right?” He grumbled some more as he scooted forward so he was closer to her, his hand resting on her thigh. “I guess? Mum is thrilled that he’s been coming around more often but if I have to hear about another one of his proposals, I might bloody hex him.” 

“You cannot hex Percy. I have a distinct feeling that might cause some unneeded animosity when you all have just started rebuilding bridges.” As she spoke, Ron’s hand was traveling further up her leg and Hermione couldn’t help as her lips parted, her body responding faster than her brain. Before she could think twice, Ron’s body was on top of hers and the hand that wasn’t teetering dangerously close to the apex of her jean clad thighs was tangled in her mess of curls, his lips capturing hers. She felt his tongue swipe across her lips and as they parted further, his tongue entered her mouth, a moan escaping as her hand came up to his waist, small fingers sliding up underneath his untucked shirt. 

As Ron broke the kiss to move his lips down her neck and to her pulse point, Hermione felt the need to stop him, if only because she knew they couldn’t continue and if she didn’t stop now, it was going to end with her wearing significantly less clothing. Her hands found his chest and she pushed gently, Ron falling back on his knees as he looked down at her, confusion blooming across his features. “‘Mione, what..?” She sighed and readjusted so she was in a sitting position, pulling the hem of her shirt down to cover her stomach before she scrunched her nose, running a hand across her brow. 

“Ron, we can’t keep doing,” she gestured between them with her hand, “this. As much as I enjoy the physical aspects, and believe me, I do, don’t try to tell me you feel more than friendship for me. Take away the shagging and leave just Ron and Hermione, what do you see?” The confusion on his features melted into understanding and he shifted so he was sitting on the cushions completely as well. She could see him chewing the inside of his lip, a habit he’d developed when he was mulling things over and she felt herself sigh inwardly, relieved when he gave her his usual loose grin. “You’re right. As much as I do enjoy having someone I can be with, it’s not fair to you or to our friendship, though I do kind of hate that you’re right.” He chuckled and she rolled her eyes, nudging his thigh with her toes in response. “Alright, from here on out, we’re back to friendly touches, no weirdness.” Hermione nodded, happy to know they’d be just fine, “No weirdness. You know we’ve been through enough over the years, we always come back.” 

\--

The two had migrated down from her office at some point and were holed up in the kitchen, two glasses of tea and a plate of biscuits on the table in front of them as Ron regaled Hermione with stories he’d heard from Charlie who was crashing at the Burrow while he helped with the repairs on Hogwarts before start of term. She hadn’t realized how late it had gotten until she started yawning and Ron made to stand up, more than okay to call it a night. They heard the front door open and Sirius stumbled his way into the kitchen, eyes bouncing between Ron and Hermione. “Aye, Hermione, Ron.” His words were just slightly slurred which meant he’d been at the muggle bar a few blocks down, something he’d taken to doing a couple of nights a week. Hermione rolled her eyes slightly and pressed a chaste kiss to Ron’s cheek before he hugged her goodbye and gave Sirius a three fingered salute before grabbing a handful of the green powder off the mantle and stepping into the flames. 

Sirius watched Hermione for a moment before collapsing into one of the kitchen chairs, an eyebrow raised as she found herself taking in his aristocratic features. There was no doubt Sirius was a Black and even though he’d eschewed all forms of Pureblood status and society, she understood why Walburga had wanted him to carry on their legacy, as unnoble as it was. He grabbed a biscuit from the plate and took a bite, giving her his usual smirk. “How are things with Ron then, kitten? He always seems to come over when no one else is here, should Molly be gearing up for another wedding in the future?” Sirius found himself hoping, without good reason, that there would be no Weasley weddings in the near future, at least any that involved the witch in front of him. 

He still had no desire to try and unpack what he was feeling as her eyes met his and not for the first time, he found himself wishing she’d never stop looking. 

Hermione rolled her eyes again and tried to ignore the warmth in her cheeks as she noted that the eye rolls around Sirius had started to become far more frequent. Waving her wand over the teacups, she floated them to the sink and dropped them in gently as she rounded the table so she was standing next to Sirius. She leaned down and balanced herself on the arm of the chair he was lounging in and gave him a sweet smile, the smell of liquor mixed with leather and a hint of tobacco hitting her nostrils, something she found she didn’t actually mind. “Ron and I are just friends, but if you’re curious about who I may or may not be shagging, you can just ask. I might not tell you, but it’s better than making assumptions right?” She stepped away from the chair and straightened up, moving her way towards the stairs. As she started to climb she paused and turned around, Sirius’s eyes looking like a storm she’d get lost in. “Good night Sirius.” As she disappeared at the top of the landing, he looked at the biscuit long forgotten in his hand and shoved it in his mouth, trying to ignore the smell of lemongrass and cloves that seemed to linger in the air long after Hermione had gone.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't expect to have another chapter up quite so soon, but tbh I'm already invested in this story so I figured I'd capitalize on my hamster running on his wheel. 
> 
> We get to see a little bit more of how Hermione and Sirius actually help each other cope in this chapter and I like seeing how they can use each other for support, but it's gonna be a bit before either of them are ready to admit things to themselves. 
> 
> Also, keep in mind there is no beta so I apologize for grammar. I get excited and sometimes don't catch it!

**July 31st, 1998**

It was Harry’s 18th birthday and though they’d tossed around the idea of having his party at Grimmauld Place instead of the Burrow, much to Molly’s delight, Harry had relented and let her handle it as per usual. Sirius was, for once, excited to be able to properly celebrate his godson’s birthday now that his name had been officially cleared and the Ministry was no longer trying to hunt him down. Sirius couldn’t keep the grin off his face as he leaned up against a tree in the Weasley’s backyard, a glass of firewhiskey in his hand as he chatted with Arthur and Remus. 

Arthur had finished telling the two Marauders about his new position within the Ministry, Kingsley having decided he felt the Weasley patriarch would do better to help out as the interim head of the DMLE for the time being when Molly’s voice rang out, alerting them that the food was ready. With this being the first birthday post the end of the war, everyone was doing their best to focus on enjoying the time that they had with each other and Sirius knew that as much as Harry didn’t want the attention on him, he was happy to have his family and friends around him. 

As the men made their way to the long row of tables that had been laden down with food, Sirius clapped Harry on the back before sliding into the seat next to him, catching sight of Hermione on his other side, in deep conversation with Neville Longbottom, Hermione gesturing with her hands that held a roll, unaware of how close she was to her glass of pumpkin juice. Ignoring the way his chest felt heavy as he watched them, he focused instead on Harry who was busy loading his plate with an assortment of meats. 

“Every time I think this will be the event that Molly doesn’t go all out on a gathering, she proves me wrong.” Despite their difference of opinion over the last couple of years, Sirius did appreciate Molly for loving Harry as much as she did, knowing the woman already had so much of her own to deal with all of her children. He would be hard pressed to admit it to her because he hated to have not been the one that was around for Harry when he was younger, he was grateful all the same. Harry snorted as he took a bite, chewing thoughtfully and swallowing before he spoke. “I told her it didn’t need to be anything crazy, but she just patted me on the cheek and said ‘of course, dear’. I knew I wasn’t going to be able to get away with something small. 

He was right of course as Sirius glanced around the backyard, taking in the sight of not only the entirety of the Weasley’s, but Remus, Tonks, Teddy and Tonks’ mother Andromeda, several of Harry’s friends from school as well as Kingsley Shacklebolt and a few other Order members. Beginning to make his own plate, Sirius let out a low chuckle, “Well, at least it isn’t anything too crazy, there aren’t any banners proclaiming your glorious day of birth. A day I distinctly remember because Lily threatened to hex James if he fainted before you’d made it into the world. Lucky for him, he remained upright and all was well in the Potter household, though if Remus hadn’t convinced me to give you back to your mum, I don’t know if I would have ever let you go when they let me hold you.” He mused wistfully before catching Remus’ eye, resisting the urge to flip him off when he’d realized he’d heard him talking. Damn his friend and his enhanced hearing. 

Remus held Teddy in one arm as he rolled his eyes, a smile playing at the corner of his lips before Sirius winked and zoned back in on his plate. Across from him, he couldn’t help but overhear Ginny telling Luna about how after she’d finished Hogwarts, she was hoping to try out for a professional Quidditch team. He knew that Minerva had said that work on the castle would be done by the start of term and had even extended offers to students who wished to go back and finish school if they’d missed. Talk of the future made Sirius break into a loose grin, happy that the people around him still had a future to look forward to. He lost himself in conversation with Bill who was sat on his right, filling Sirius in on some of the things they’d been working on at Gringotts to try and get the bank back to tip top shape. 

When the guests were all nearly too stuffed to do anything else, Molly enlisted the help of Hermione and Ginny to clear some space for the cake she’d made and for the sizeable stack of presents that were placed in front of Harry whose ears were becoming a lovely shade of red. As the sounds of Happy Birthday founded away, the twins the last two to finish with a resounding crack, fireworks went off above them, dancing and spinning in different shapes as Harry blew out the candles. 

Harry cleared his throat before glancing at the presents, a sheepish smile on his face as he looked around. “None of you needed to get me anything, but thank you all so much.” There were choruses of happy birthdays as people held their glasses in his direction and he made his way through the gifts. Sirius had been unsure of what to get him, but figured that a small photo album with copies of the photos he had from over the years with his parents would be something he would enjoy, a fact that seemed to be confirmed when he’d pulled Sirius into a hug later, his green eyes a little brighter than normal. 

As people were starting to leave, Sirius was sidled up to Tonks, an arm around her shoulders as she watched Harry holding Teddy, bouncing on the balls of his feet to rock the baby to sleep, her free hand that wasn’t slung around Sirius’ hips firmly wrapped around her husband’s hand. She smiled as she watched Teddy’s hair shift to match Harry’s and sighed, “I think Harry is already wrapped around Teddy’s little finger.” She was right, and as sad as it made Sirius to think of all the time he’d missed out with Harry, he was glad to know Harry wouldn’t miss out on a single thing. Remus watched the two with a distant look in his eyes and Sirius knew Remus was thinking something very similar. 

As Teddy fell asleep, Remus spoke quietly, “I think it’s time we said our goodbyes so we can get Teddy in his own bed.” Sirius wrapped his cousin in a hug before turning to Andromeda and doing the same. Clapping Remus on the arm, he winked and sauntered off, pulling the flask from the pocket of his leather jacket, eyes catching the back of Hermione’s head as she directed dishes in front of her, wondering vaguely if she’d want any help before we was swept up into a conversation with Charlie Weasley and the thought disappeared. 

\--

Hermione maneuvered the stack of dishes she was levitating into the sink and leaned against the counter, smiling as Molly bustled around the kitchen, her wand directing a flannel as it scrubbed a pot. “What do you need from me, Mrs Weasley? Is there anything else I can help with?” 

Mrs Weasley ran a hand through the halo of red hair that puffed out haphazardly from her head and shook her head with a smile, shooing the younger witch with her hands. “Nope, I’m fine in here, go and spend some time with your friends.” Shooing Hermione out the door once more, Hermione stifled a giggle and holstered her wand, finding herself staring at her friends who’d all migrated to the edges of the backyard, speaking amongst themselves. 

As her feet carried her across the yard when she caught sight of Sirius, taking him in as he talked to Charlie. He’d come in his usual attire of black muggle jeans and his leather jacket over a plain muggle t-shirt, his dragonhide boots the only distinctly non-muggle thing about him and Hermione was trying to convince herself to stop thinking just how good he looked when she froze as he caught her eye, smirk firmly on his lips. She averted her gaze and made her way to her friends a little faster, not wanting to acknowledge him. 

She missed the way his eyes continued to follow her, an eyebrow ticked upwards. 

“Alright, ‘Mione?” Ignoring the nickname, Hermione smiled brightly at Ron, ignoring the man behind her who she hoped had gone back to his conversation. “I’m alright, Ron. What did I miss?” 

Ginny sighed and gave Ron a pointed look before rolling her eyes. “We were discussing what everyone’s plans were and if anyone was going to go back to Hogwarts to finish out their schooling, but Ron here says that he already knows he’s not going back.” 

Hermione couldn’t say she was surprised, out of everyone, Ron was the one who’d liked school the least, though she had thought he might at the very least consider it. 

“We can’t all be Hermione, Gin.” Ron huffed and crossed his arms over his chest and Harry and Neville looked uncomfortable while Luna watched them all with a hint of curiosity in her eyes. 

Hermione’s eyes narrowed in Ron’s direction and she could feel the heat in her cheeks. “And what _exactly_ , is that supposed to mean Ronald?” Ron shuffled his feet and grumbled, his brow furrowed in annoyance. “It’s just, we all know you’re gonna go back to Hogwarts, but I don’t know why that means the rest of us have to.” 

“For your information, I haven’t decided if I’m going back this year, not that it’s any of your concern.” She ignored the glances from the others, attention focused solely on the tall ginger in front of her, “And you’re an adult who can make your own decisions now, you don’t have to have me hold your hand.” 

She couldn’t deny that his words had hit a sore spot. She had considered going back to finish her seventh year, but she truly didn’t know if she wanted to spend any amount of time in Hogwarts right now. Professor McGonagall had mentioned that students could sit for their N.E.W.Ts if they felt they were ready and she’d really started to contemplate it. 

Ron looked a little startled at her outburst and had the decency to mumble an apology as Harry spoke up, “You’re thinking about not going back? How come you haven’t mentioned it before now?” 

She shrugged and pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to ignore the headache she could feel forming. “It just hadn’t been brought up in conversation yet and I’m not fully decided. Are you going back?” She looked around at Neville and Harry, directing the question to the two of them, hoping they could move the conversation away from her. 

“I honestly hadn’t thought about it. The thought of going back to Hogwarts has been the furthest thing from my mind. I’ve been,” he cast a glance at Ginny, his ears red once again, “distracted.” 

Ron groaned, “Can you not talk about my sister and her distractions while I’m standing here?” 

Hermione rolled her eyes as Neville perked up, hands in his pockets “I think I might just sit for my N.E.W.Ts. I was thinking about trying to get on at the Ministry maybe… maybe as an Auror.” 

“Oh Neville, you’d make a great Auror.” Hermione tried to keep her voice from betraying her as her thoughts were consumed for a moment with the thought of Frank and Alice Longbottom and knew partially what made Neville want to consider it, She couldn’t help the pang of sadness that bounced around her chest. 

She glanced between Ron and Harry, knowing they both wanted to still try to go down the Auror path as well, wondering if the Auror office would have an influx of former DA members before it was all said and done. 

The conversation shifted away from talk of school, Hermione grateful for the change in topics as she clutched the butterbeer bottle in her hands that the twins had brought them all before they’d joined Charlie and Sirius. Hermione knew she should have wanted to go back and finish, but after the last year, sitting in a classroom just didn’t seem like the most important thing anymore. 

\--

**August 3rd, 1998**

The darkness surrounded her as she felt the scream rip from her throat, the sounds of Bellatrix’s laughter ringing in her ears as she shot up in her bed, thankful for the silencing charms she’d placed around her room so she wouldn’t bother Harry and Sirius again. Her nightmares had been consistent since Malfoy Manor and she rubbed her hand against the scar left from Bellatrix’s cursed blade, shivering involuntarily. 

They weren’t always the same, sometimes the nightmare was Malfoy Manor, other times it was the Forest of Dean after the splinching. Often it was the battle of Hogwarts, but regardless, as she looked around the darkness of her bedroom, she knew she wouldn’t be going back to sleep any time soon. Fumbling for her wand on the nightstand, she cast a Tempus charm and sighed. She’d hoped it was close enough to sunrise she could just suffer through, but two in the morning meant if she didn’t at least try to relax and go back to sleep, she was going to be miserable all day. 

Laying back against the pillows, she stared at the ceiling, hands cradling her forehead as she willed herself to go back to sleep, considering the vial of dreamless sleep she had in her beaded bag, but she knew it was only a temporary fix and one she didn’t want to rely on. 

She lay there for a few moments longer before huffing and sitting up once more, kicking her blankets off and standing, pulling a pair of sleep shorts over her knickers, her oversized sleep shirt she’d stolen from Harry hanging off her shoulder. She pulled down her silencing charms and whispered ‘lumos’, her wand lighting as she made her way out into the hallway and down the stairs, intending to collapse on the couch and read some more of her book when she realized the couch was in fact already occupied. 

Hermione’s brow furrowed as she realized who it was, pausing so as not to startle him. She held her wand a little higher and whispered, “Sirius?” 

At the sound of her voice, he tore his gaze away from the fireplace and gave her a tight grin. “Kitten. Nightmares again?” 

\--

**_May 11, 1998_**

_Sirius flung curse after curse at any Death Eater he came across, his focus split as he battled two at once. At the sound of Bellatrix’s laughter, Sirius turned just in time to see her wand aimed at Nymphadora, Avada Kedavra spilling from her lips. As he fought his way towards them, his heart shattered as he watched a head full of pink hair crumple to the ground as Bella cackled over her body._

_“Filthy blood-traitor, just like her mother and just like you. You should have died in the Ministry, but I won’t make that same mistake twice.” Her wand raised, he waited for the green light he knew would come as she opened her mouth._

_Sirius found himself tangled in his sheets, body thrashing for a moment until he realized he wasn’t at Hogwarts, but his own bed. He jolted upright, the sound of Hermione’s voice as she stroked his hair bringing him down from the nightmare. “Hey, you’re safe. It’s fine. Tonks is fine.” Silver eyes tried to focus on the witch kneeling next to his bed, letting the feel of her hand in his hair settle his erratic breathing. One hand clutched his sheets while he used the other to support his head, breathing in deeply as the scent of lemongrass filled his senses._

_As he realized he was in fact safe, the hand tangled in his sheets moved up to hold the hand stroking his hair, squeezing it briefly. “I forgot to set the silencing charm. I’m sorry you had to hear that.” Hermione watched him, eyes shining brightly in the moonlight, shaking her head. “I have them too. There’s nothing to apologize for.”_

\--

“I couldn’t go back to sleep.” she nodded and Sirius watched as Hermione settled on the couch, feet tucked up underneath her, her knees grazing Sirius’ thigh. 

Sirius held out his glass of firewhiskey and sighed as she took a sip, far less sputtering than there had been a few months ago. They’d both had their fair share of nightmares and it was more of a common occurrence for them to share a glass than not. 

He also knew they’d both started remembering their silencing charms, neither wanting to disturb the other or Harry, who somehow seemed to be sleeping just fine, which they were both grateful for. “Have you had them a lot recently?” 

She shook her head and passed the glass back to him after another sip, thankful for the warmth in her chest. “I had started to get my hopes up, that maybe they were starting to go away but I guess I was too optimistic.” He caught the movement as her hand strayed to the scar on her forearm and his eyes flitted up to her face as she stared into the fire. 

“Malfoy Manor?” He knew what had happened, Hermione confessing everything after she’d had her first nightmare since moving in when Sirius found her crying over a cup of tea in the kitchen. She nodded, pulling her bottom lip in between her teeth and Sirius had to force himself not to remove it. Instead he pulled her legs towards him, draping them in his lap, his hands resting on her shins. 

“I dreamt that it was Remus Bellatrix killed this time. It’s rarely the same person, but gods does it hurt no matter who it is.” Chocolate eyes found his and he relaxed almost imperceptibly under her gaze. No matter how many nightmares he had, he wouldn’t tell her the ones he dreaded most involved losing her. 

He downed the rest of the amber liquid before refilling it, chuckling quietly as Hermione held out her hand towards him. Placing the glass in her hand, he shifted so he was leaning more against the arm of the couch, watching as she took a larger drink than before, her shoulders losing some of their tightness. They fell into a companionable silence, watching the flames dance and drinking until they started to doze off. 

And that was how Harry found them the next morning. Hermione on one end of the couch, her legs thrown over Sirius’, who was curled up on the other end. 

\--

**August 14, 1998**

Hermione had been in the kitchen, pulling things out of the cooling cabinet to make for lunch when a tapping at the window caught her attention and she raised an eyebrow, opening the window as a tawny owl flew in and dropped a letter on the table before it perched on the back of a chair, looking at her expectantly. 

Rolling her eyes, she held out a slice of the meat in her hands, the owl snatching it before flying back out the window, not waiting for her response. “Bloody owls.” She set the food down on the table and reached for the letter, turning it over in her hands and furrowing her brow in confusion. The seal on the back was the Ministry’s. 

As she opened the letter her eyes scanned it before she called up the stairs. “Sirius! Harry! Can you both join me in the kitchen please?” She reread the letter, taking in the information. 

_Harry, Hermione and Sirius_

_If you’re free tonight at 7pm, I would like to request a short meeting with the three of you at Grimmauld Place. I’ve asked Ron Weasley to join us as well. It’s nothing urgent, but it is of importance._

_Also, the owl I used does not like to hang around, so please send a Patronus._

_\- Kingsley Shacklebolt_

She heard the footsteps thundering down the stairs as both men joined her, expecting lunch to be done. They shot each other quizzical glances before Hermione held up the letter in her hands. “Kingsley has requested a meeting with the three of us and Ron tonight.” 

Sirius reached for the letter, Hermione letting it go as she went back to making sandwiches. As Harry read over his shoulder, he looked concerned. “What do you think the Minister wants with us?” 

“I guess we’ll find out.” Sirius cast his Patronus and gave it their response, sliding into a seat at the table. “I really have no idea though. It could be something related to everything that happened, but then I don’t know why it would just be the four of us.” A look of contemplation bloomed across his features but he was distracted when Hermione set a plate in front of him. 

“Thanks Kitten.” He grinned and tucked into his sandwich, Harry thanking Hermione as she set one down in front of him too. 

Her thoughts continued to race as she tried to think of what the Minister could want, nibbling on her own sandwich, missing the glances from the men sitting opposite her. 

\--

Ron had Floo’d in from the Burrow at half past five, deciding to join them for a dinner which had consisted of Muggle Chinese takeaway as they all anxiously awaited Kingsley. Hermione had ensconced herself on the couch with her book while Harry, Ron and Sirius chatted about whatever came to mind. The closer it got to seven, the more jittery they all got, Sirius pouring each of them some firewhiskey to calm down, though Hermione had passed. 

When the Floo lit up and Kingsley stepped out, the conversation came to a stop as he siphoned the soot off his robes. Glancing up at the concerned faces, he cracked a smile. “Don’t look so worried, it’s nothing upsetting.” 

He folded himself in to one of the squishy arm chairs as Sirius took the spot on the couch next to Hermione and Harry sat between Sirius and the arm of the couch. Ron lowered himself into the other armchair and Hermione made eye contact with the Minister, confusion splashed across the planes of her face. 

“Not to rush you or anything Minister, but what does bring you by? Your note was very vague.” 

Kingsley let out a deep chuckle and nodded, “You’re right Miss Granger, but I wanted to give the details in person. I wanted to speak to you four because as you know, I’m working to rebuild the Ministry and I want to bring in good people. We’ve implemented a bit of an Auror fast track specifically for people who have more, shall we say, hands on experience and wanted to reach out to see if you would be interested.” 

The four exchanged glances, but it was Harry who broke the spell that seemed to have fallen over them. “You want us to join the Aurors? But Ron, Hermione and I haven’t even taken our N.E.W.Ts.” 

Kingsley steepled his fingers in front of his nose, “We’re aware, but we’re taking a few things into consideration at the moment and that is one of them.” 

Sirius scoffed, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. “You do remember I quit the Aurors right? I have a distinct memory of telling Longarm to shove that badge up his a-.” Kingsley held up a hand and seemed like he was trying to not laugh at the memory. 

“I do remember that. I also remember how upset Moody was that he was losing one of his best Aurors.” 

“Well, Kings, as much as I appreciate the offer, I don’t think I could rejoin. Especially not with how the Ministry handled everything with me over the years.” Sirius leaned back against the couch and Hermione was acutely aware of just how close he was sitting to her, their thighs touching. 

Ron looked up from where he’d been boring a hole in the ground with his eyes and spoke quietly, “I think it’s brilliant and I say yes.” Harry nodded and Hermione had no doubt he’d join up. “I’d love to. Being an Auror was what I decided I wanted to do in fifth year, but for awhile I didn’t think it would actually be able to happen.” 

Hermione was fiddling with a loose hem on her jeans when she felt three pairs of eyes staring at her. Glancing up, she blanched and cursed inwardly when she felt the pink tinging her cheeks. “Thank you for the offer Minister, but I’d like to think it over. If that’s alright?” 

Kingsley unfolded himself from the squishy armchair and gave her a friendly incline of the head. “Of course Miss Granger. If you could let me know within the week I would appreciate it. Mr Weasley, Mr Potter, I’ll be in touch. Mr Longbottom will be thrilled to know you’ll be joining him.” 

Hermione’s head snapped up at his words and she couldn’t hide the grin that was splitting her lips. “Neville was asked to join as well?” 

Kingsley chuckled, “He was and he accepted rather enthusiastically.” He turned to Sirius, a sparkle in his eyes. “If you change your mind, you know how to get in touch.” 

Sirius gave him a half hearted salute as Kingsley disappeared into the Floo. 

Ron and Harry both looked as if they’d just found out Christmas had come early, but Sirius was scowling and Hermione was conflicted. She’d pretty much decided that she was just going to sit for her N.E.W.Ts, but she’d never even considered becoming an Auror and she wasn’t quite sure how she felt about it now. 

Kingsley had given her a week, she’d mull it over. In the meantime, she shifted, eyes finding Sirius’ as his scowl deepened, causing the features of his face to look distinctly more Black. Hermione watched him for a moment before laying her hand on his arm, feeling the rigidity of his arm muscles relax under her touch. 

Sirius knew he wasn’t going to sit on his ass for the rest of his life, but one thing was for certain, he would not be working for the Ministry again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the kudos and the comment. I didn't expect to get so much from the first chapter, but I love seeing other people who like Sirius and Hermione as much as I do! Please drop your thoughts in the comments, I'd love to hear your feedback!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So as I continue to plot this out, I've come to realize that while this is very much a Sirius/Hermione story, Neville and Hannah are going to end up being a significant subplot because the idea of them is very appealing to me and I want to explore it, so keep an eye out for when I finish up the one shot I'm writing for them that's set in this AU. 
> 
> Speaking of one shot's, I wrote a Charlie/Hermione fluff piece called Backalleys and Thunderstorms, so if you're in the market for some cute post war fluff and dancing in the rain, check it out and let me know what you think!
> 
> Also as it's now after midnight here and despite not having meant to upload this chapter on a significant day, Happy Birthday Harry Potter.

**August 24th, 1998**

It had been a week since Kingsley had offered them jobs and Hermione still hadn’t given him an answer. It wasn’t as if she’d meant to leave it to the last day, normally she would have gotten her answer to him within a day or two, but she was still trying to wrap her head around how everything was in fact okay and she could take the time to try and figure out what her next step in the wizarding world would be outside of the Golden Trio. She knew they’d all gotten letters to do interviews over the last few months with different publications, but Hermione wasn’t too keen on keeping her name in the spotlight, especially with how focused so many of the articles had been on her supposed love triangles and, as of more recently, her Muggleborn status. 

She’d sent an owl to the Ministry addressed to Kingsley and when the regal looking Eagle Owl had brought his return letter, she’d slipped her robes on over her jeans and t-shirt, leaving a note for Sirius and Harry who’d gone out to Muggle London to avoid the photographers camped out in front of Grimmauld Place. A heavy sigh escaped her lips as she tucked her beaded bag against her side and stepped just outside of the wards so she could apparate into a secluded alley outside the visitors entrance to the ministry. 

Looking around the busy street, she probably should have taken Kingsley up on his offer to floo into his office, but she’d felt it would be more proper this way. She didn’t want anyone to call favoritism and jeopardize his status as Minister, not when he was trying so hard to implement real, lasting change. She weaved through the throngs of people, curls bouncing against her shoulders and stepped into the phone booth, dialing the numbers before mentioning an appointment with the Minister, jumping slightly when her badge shot out at her. 

It only took a few moments for the lift to dump her out into the Atrium, a place she hadn’t been since she’d impersonated Mafalda Hopkirk when they’d Polyjuiced their way into the Ministry while on the hunt for the locket. She shook her head and sighed, trying to push thoughts of the war from her mind as she stepped up to the security wizard who ran a scan with his wand before clearing her to head to another set of lifts. Pushing the button for the first level, she tried to ignore the interoffice memos as they swarmed above her head, taking care to keep her eyes downcast to avoid everyone who happened to step in the same lift in the hopes no one would speak to her. 

It seemed like she was going to get away undisturbed as the lifts lurched to a stop on the Ministers floor but when they doors opened, she stepped out and directly into Draco Malfoy’s chest. Her eyes traveled up, taking in the smart black robes that hung open over fitted black dress pants and a button down shirt before her chocolate colored eyes met gray that had her for a moment wishing he was Sirius. Pulling herself from her reverie she stepped back, running her hands down the front of her own robes to make sure she wasn’t wrinkled, brow furrowed. 

“Honestly Granger, you’d think one would learn to watch where they’re walking to avoid running into people, clearly that’s too much for some.” Draco huffed and shoved his hands in his pockets, watching the witch with narrowed eyes. 

“Oh bugger off. I’m on my way to see Kings… the Minister, and I was in a rush.” She retorted, rolling her eyes and wanting nothing more than to Bat Bogey the look off his face. Her curiosity was piqued though, Hermione was fully aware that Draco was trying to clear his family name after the war and had reached out to Sirius in the process, so she wondered if he had been in to see Kingsley as well. Before she could ask, he was stepping around her and into the lift. 

“I see my dear cousin has started to rub off on your vocabulary.” There was a glint in his eyes Hermione wasn’t quite sure what to make of and he gave her a languid grin. “Have a good day, Granger.” The lift doors slid shut and she was still for a moment, unsure of what had just happened. She wasn’t quite ready to sort out her feelings for the Malfoy scion, knowing they’d all had their own battles to fight even if they were on opposite sides but she turned on her heel, pushing the thoughts of bleach blonde hair and gray eyes to the side and headed down the hallway, stopping at the desk in front of the Minister’s office, a young blonde witch peering up at her. “Name?”

“Oh, Hermione Granger, here to see Minister Shacklebolt.” The witch waved her hand, looking back down at her parchment and back up, recognition flitting across her features as she realized who she was speaking to. The witch waved her on towards the door once more with a sugary sweet smile, “He’s ready for you.”

She smoothed down the front of her robes once more before she knocked, pushing the door open when she heard a deep voice say enter. Taking in the office, she could see that it had some personal touches and didn’t feel as sterile as she’d imagined, it was… homey. Kingsley smiled brightly and gestured to the empty armchairs in front of his desk. “Hermione, I’m glad you made it. I assume you’ve made a decision then?”

She perched on the edge of one of the chairs, making sure to keep a bit of professionalism, though the urge to curl up in the armchair was palpable with how comfortable it was. She hoped Kingsley would be receptive to what she was about to propose, because she’d been mulling things over the last week and she felt like she’d really found an option that would work for her and let her find her own footing and not continue to just be best friend to Harry Potter. Not that she minded, she valued Harry’s friendship above pretty much anything, but she was desperate to find out who Hermione Granger was without the looming threat of death hanging over her head. “I have, but I also had a counter idea as well.” 

The corner of Kingsley’s lips twitched slightly upwards as he leaned forward, elbows on the desk as he steepled his fingers under his chin. “Go on.”

Hermione took a breath to steady her thoughts, knowing she’d gone over what she wanted to say enough times that she knew she was ready. “I would like to say thank you for the offer to join the Aurors. While I appreciate it, I’ve had enough of dark wizards and deliberately putting myself in harm's way. As difficult as it will be to let them off on their own without me, I’ll leave that up to Harry and Ron.” She paused for a moment, realizing that it would actually be hard for her to not keep tabs on them and make sure they were safe, but they were capable on their own and she had to let them go on without her eventually.

“I’ve been thinking about what I want and how I want to make a change of my own within the wizarding world, and I really want to help draft new pieces of legislation and do research that will help people like Remus and...me and others like us who’ve suffered so much at the hands of the magical community. I’ve spent the last seven years immersed in the magic, but you know that Muggleborns catch just as much flack and it’s time to show that we can change the prejudices so deeply ingrained in our world.” 

Kingsley stared at her for long enough that Hermione had to resist the urge to squirm under the scrutiny, her hands folded in her lap as she twisted her fingers together to keep the rest of her still. After what felt like an eternity, the Minister spoke, “Miss Granger, you’ll have to let me think on your proposal, but I can tell you that the Ministry would be lucky to have you in any aspect and would benefit from your fresh perspective. Give me a few days and I’ll be in touch.” 

She let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding and smiled brightly, tucking a curl behind her ear. “Thank you for hearing me out and I look forward to speaking again.” As she rose, he waved a hand toward the fireplace, “Would you like to floo back to Grimmauld? I feel it’d be better than having to traipse back through the building.” 

He chuckled and she nodded, stepping up to the fireplace and grabbing a handful of the sparkly powder. “Thank you again Kingsley.” He gave her a nod and she threw the powder into the flames and stepped in calling out her home and disappearing. She missed the look of contemplation splashed across his features and the start of something that almost could have been seen as an aha moment.

\--

Sirius had found himself nestled on a stool at the bar of the Leaky Cauldron, ignoring the open stares he was receiving from some of the other patrons as he stared forlornly, fingers swirling the amber liquid in the glass in front of him. Having Harry and Hermione at Grimmauld Place had started to help Sirius feel like his childhood home could be a place he didn’t mind staying in, but he was restless and even though he’d turned down Kingsley’s offer to take his old job back, the thought of having something to do other than sit on his ass was rather appealing. 

He downed the rest of the liquid in his glass before it refilled in front of him and Sirius tipped the glass towards the bartender in acknowledgement, Tom chuckling from the other side of the bar where he’d been scrubbing at a particularly sticky spot. Sirius had once asked Tom why he didn’t use cleaning spells, but the older wizard had just poured him a drink and told him sometimes the Muggle way worked just as well if not better. As Tom shoved the rag under the bar, he made his way back to Sirius and pitched his head slightly, “Sickle for your thoughts there Sirius?” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, noting that it was getting rather shaggy, but ignoring the thoughts of maybe considering a haircut. 

“I spent so many years locked up or on the run or fighting two wars and now… I just sit around all day. You’d think with my newfound freedom I’d be ecstatic but I just feel the need to do something. I don’t need a job, but I would love to find something I’m passionate about. You’ve owned the Leaky for so long and you still seem like you love it. I once thought I was passionate about being an Auror, but that soured so quickly and I just, how do you do it?”

Tom propped his elbow up on the bar and watched the younger wizard for a moment, eyes twinkling, “A little restlessness is to be expected after the hell you went through. Merlin knows we’ve all lost something over the years, but some of us were luckier than others.” He waved his wand and refilled glasses for the couple at the end of the bar before turning back to Sirius. “It’s funny you should mention how long I’ve owned this place. I’d started thinking that now that the world has righted itself, it might be high time for me to take the next fifty years or so and enjoy a nice retirement. Maybe sell this place. You know anyone keen on buying a pub?” 

With how fast Sirius’ head swiveled, he probably should have been worried about whiplash, but his gray eyes were wide as he took in the barman’s words. “Wait, really? You’re wanting to sell? But you’ve been here for so long, it won’t be the Leaky without you.” The beginnings of a thought had started to form, spurred on by Tom’s words and Sirius couldn’t help but wonder if that had been the man’s intention. 

“The Leaky Cauldron will always be the Leaky Cauldron, the ownership doesn’t matter. I wasn’t the first person to own this place, I took it on after my dad no longer wanted it, but I have no children to pass it on to and I’m rather looking forward to taking the next fifty years to do absolutely nothing and enjoy it.” He gave a conspiratorial glance around the pub before his gaze found Sirius’ again. “What do you think Black? Care to take on a pub from an old wizard desperate to get out of Diagon Alley?”

If he were any other man, he probably would have realized this was something he should mull over before accepting, especially having already had a few firewhiskey’s, but something inside of him went off like a Filibusters firework and he’d downed the rest of his glass, a wide grin on his features. “I’m in. Let’s talk prices and you can teach me how to be a bar owner.”

Sirius wasn’t entirely sure how long he’d sat there listening to Tom, but he made sure to pay attention, knowing if he was going to run a pub as well loved as the Leaky Cauldron, he didn’t want to cock it up. It seemed relatively straightforward, though Tom had mentioned they were down a bartender but Sirius had spent enough time in bars, he knew he could handle it until he could find someone to step in full time. His arm full of parchment, he tucked it into his leather jacket and stepped into the floo, shouting Grimmauld Place as he disappeared into the flames. 

\--

Harry had stumbled off to bed, exhausted from a day spent at the Burrow with Ginny before she was shipped off back to Hogwarts but as he’d pointed out to Hermione, he had every intention of sneaking the redhead back to Grimmauld Place for an unsupervised visit before she was gone. Hermione had resisted the urge to roll her eyes before lightly pushing Harry up the stairs, insisting he needed his beauty sleep if he was going to keep up with Ginny.

She’d taken the silence in stride and had poured herself a glass of firewhiskey, the bottle on the end table next to her as she set up on the couch, her hair tossed up into a messy bun and her pajama shorts clad legs stretched out across the cushions, her book in her lap, a sigh of contentment expelling from her lips. She’d nearly finished her book in its entirety when the floo went off and Sirius stepped through, a giddy but rather determined look on his face. 

As he removed rolls of parchment from his jacket and set them on the coffee table, he moved to the couch and slipped an arm under Hermione’s legs, lifting them slightly so he could slide underneath them, resting them across his lap as he shrugged out of his jacket and tossed it on an armchair. “You look positively pleased with yourself.” She arched an eyebrow and moved her bookmark to not lose her place before setting the book on the coffee table before grabbing her glass, sipping as Sirius bounced slightly in his seat. 

“Kitten, you’re looking at the new owner of the Leaky Cauldron.” He turned to look at her, concerned as she choked on the drink she was taking, coughing to relieve herself a bit. He carried on when he realized she was fine, his usual smirk plastered on his lips. “I was going to tell you and Harry at the same time, but well, I saw you and I couldn’t wait.” 

His smile was infectious and Hermione couldn’t help the twitch at the corners of her mouth as she took another drink, thankful for it going down smoothly. As Sirius pulled the glass from her fingers, he took a deep swig and let his eyes search Hermione’s face, not wanting to betray his thoughts but hoping the young witch wouldn’t think him absolutely daft. Regardless of the warmth he felt in his stomach anytime he caught a whiff of her scent, he did truly value her opinion and didn’t want to disappoint her. 

Her hand found the one he had resting on her shins and she laced their fingers together, giving them a squeeze as she spoke, “Well, you did say you wanted something to do and as far as jobs you could do that wouldn’t drive you batty within a week, I’d have to say a place like the Leaky might just be perfect for you. But how in Merlin’s name did you end up owning the Leaky Cauldron?”

Sirius downed the rest of the drink before passing her the glass, speaking animatedly as she filled it back up from the bottle. “I was having a normal conversation with Tom when I started talking about how I was kind of thinking about trying to find some kind of job to occupy my time and he mentioned he was thinking about selling the Leaky and retiring to some place for the next half century. I thought, why the bloody hell not, I could be a barman and now here we are, I’m the owner of the Leaky Cauldron. Well, I will be in the morning, I have to sign some stuff and pay a visit to Gringotts but it’s all but done. Tom is sticking around for another month and then it’s just me.” 

For the first time in years, Sirius finally felt like he had a sense of purpose, something to look forward to that was just his and he couldn’t wait to jump in with both feet. He watched Hermione for a moment, taking in the curls that were falling from the bun on her head and the way she looked like she was genuinely happy for him and for once he didn’t ignore the way his body seemed to hum when she gave him that smile, the one that made him feel like maybe he wasn’t such a fuck up. He propped his feet up on the table and let his thumb rub soft patterns into her shin, remembering she’d had her meeting with Kingsley that day. “Oh! How did it go at the Ministry? You never fully said what your answer for Kingsley was.” 

She swished the liquid in the glass and snorted, breath pushing out of her nose. “It’s funny you mention the Ministry. I fully ran into Draco as I was stepping off the lift.” Sirius chuckled at the thought of the run in and made a mental note to owl his cousin to see if he wanted to do drinks. Being around Narcissa and Draco was still new, but with Lucius out of the way, it was like Sirius had gotten his Cissa back and he wanted to see where they could go. Even Andromeda had started coming around to the idea of having her sister back in her life though they were all taking things slowly. 

“I don’t want to be an Auror. I’ve seen enough bloodshed and dark wizardry to last me four lifetimes, but I do want to make a change and I’d love to be able to help Remus and Muggleborns like me. I want to fight against the prejudices so rooted against lycanthropy and blood and creatures wizards think are beneath them. I want to help Kingsley make a change at the Ministry and in the wizarding world.” She knew it was what she was passionate about, thoughts of S.P.E.W in the back of her mind, knowing it was a big part of what made her want to help make the needed changes, even if she’d come to accept she had a been a little misguided, though well intentioned about house elf affairs. 

She could feel the warmth in her cheeks as she spoke, though she wasn’t sure if it was the firewhiskey, potential job prospects or the fact that she was acutely aware of their still clasped hands with his thumb on her shin and she took another sip of firewhiskey to focus on that instead. “Kingsley said he’d be in touch, so I don’t actually know what’s going to happen, but hopefully he can find me a position that actually lets me do something. I would hate to just be a file girl.” She huffed quietly and settled into the arm of the couch, shooting Sirius a withering glare as he chuckled. 

Throwing his free hand up in a sign of surrender he let it fall back down as he tried to defend himself. “I’m not laughing at what you told Kings. I think that’s a bloody brilliant idea and if anyone can help change the world, it’s you. You’ve already been doing it since you were eleven, but I am laughing at the thought of you being a file girl. Something you very clearly would be miserable doing. Not that you wouldn’t be the best file girl the ministry has ever seen of course.” Hermione couldn’t help the giggles she let out at his words. 

“I would be a damn good file girl, but I really hope it doesn’t come to that.” Her eyes found Sirius’, dancing amber in the firelight, “And for what it’s worth, I do think you’ll be a great barman. You’re enigmatic, far too cheeky for your own good and sometimes the biggest pain in the arse, but out of everyone who could take over for Tom, you make the most sense. And I guess it gives me more reason to hang out at the Leaky Cauldron, though I can see the headlines now. _'War Heroine and Former Lover of the Boy Who Lived Stalking his Godfather, Most Eligible Bachelor Sirius Black’_ .” She used her glass of firewhiskey to demonstrate it in the air as she spoke, knowing that as much as she was joking, it wouldn’t surprise her if it ever became a real headline at the Prophet. 

“If you decided to stalk me, I feel like it would be a damn good day indeed. I could do much worse on the stalker front.” He smirked before letting his head tilt to the side gently, “Kitten, you’re going to do amazing things, I’m just glad I’m along for the ride."

\--

**August 26th 1998**

Hermione scrunched her nose and held the books in her arms close to her chest as she walked past Harry’s room, realizing that he’d finally gotten Ginny away from the Burrow and from the sounds of it, they were most definitely enjoying themselves, but Sweet Circe why couldn’t they have thrown up a Silencing Charm. She took the steps two at a time, cursing inwardly as she realized how much noise she was making, pausing to see if she’d woken Walburga’s portrait. When silence filled the air, she let out a sigh of relief and stepped off the last stair, turning down the hallway to move into the kitchen to find something to eat. With Sirius at the Leaky Cauldron and Harry and Ginny preoccupied, she was on her own for lunch. 

As she puttered around the cooling cabinet, she pulled out some leftover roast and potatoes Molly had sent over from Sunday dinner, plating some before setting it on the table and waving her hand, muttering a wandless heating charm. She pulled one of the books towards her that she’d set on the table and double checked the cover of  _ Hairy Snout, Human Heart _ before diving into the pages. She lost herself in the book until the sounds of footsteps on the stairs interrupted her and she couldn’t suppress the glare she leveled at her friends as they entered the kitchen. 

“I love you both, but I swear to Merlin if one of you doesn’t start remembering a Silencing Charm, I’ll hex you.” 

Harry looked rather sheepish as Hermione admonished them but Ginny just grinned and threw herself into a chair at the table, shrugging nonchalantly. “Oh please, I can think of a few occasions where you and ickle Ronniekins forgot to throw one up so really it’s just tit for tat.” Hermione narrowed her eyes but it wasn’t long before her lips were twitching upwards. “You’re lucky you’re headed back to Hogwarts and I would hate to have to listen to Harry if he’d been deprived of your affections before you left. Where does your mum think you are anyway?”

Ginny’s eyes danced mischievously and she laced her fingers through Harry’s on the table, the latter who’d flopped into the chair beside her. “I told her you and I were shopping in Muggle London for some things before I left for school. I knew you wouldn’t pop by the Burrow any time soon so it was the best option.” 

“You banked on me not ruining your cover? Ginny Weasley, I don’t know whether to be proud or offended that you’ve pinned me so well. But I do not want to face the wrath of your mother anytime soon, so maybe clue me in next time?” 

“Deal.” Ginny chuckled and Hermione could see the redhead melt slightly as Harry brought her knuckles to his lips to press a light kiss against them. 

“You two are so cute it makes me sick.” Hermione fake gagged as she rolled her eyes and Harry’s finger came up to send her a rude gesture. 

“You’re the one who’s gonna end up taking care of me when I come back from Auror training a right mess, so by the time it’s all said and done you’re going to be begging Ginny to come back.” He smirked and Hermione sighed, dropping her head to the table. “Godric, save me.”

\--

**September 1st, 1998**

Hermione and Harry had joined Ron and Mr and Mrs Weasley to see Ginny off for her final year, a pang of sadness pinging around Hermione’s chest as she realized that she truly was done with the place that had once been her home, her solace in a world that was always topsy turvy. She shook her head as Ron slipped an arm around her shoulders, bringing her focus back to the platform. “It’s a bit weird isn’t it? Not going back?” 

She let out a deep sigh and nodded, leaning her head against his chest, watching as Ginny wrapped Harry into an embrace so tight she was sure the redhead would crack one of his ribs in the process. “It is, but as sad as I am to know I’m not going back, I’m starting to feel excited for what’s ahead of us. Maybe we can finally have a Halloween that doesn’t involve Trolls, Triwizard Tournaments or secret chambers.” The flash of cameras caught her attention out of her peripheral vision and she had to resist the urge to bury her face into Ron’s shirt. “A Galleon on Harry and Ginny making the front page of the Prophet tomorrow.  _ ‘The Boy Who Lived Sends Girlfriend Back to School With a Tearful Goodbye.’ _ It makes me want to scream. Don’t they have anything better to do?” 

The cameras flashed in rapid succession as Harry pulled the redhead even closer, as if trying to fit them into the same skin and kissed her deeply before letting her go, his ears tinged pink as he seemed to remember where they were. Ginny bounded over to the rest of the group, her fingers entwined with Harry’s, “It’s not the same going back without you guys. I think the only thing keeping me going is knowing I’ll at least have Luna around.”

Ron was the one to step forward to wrap his sister in a tight hug, letting his arm drop from Hermione’s shoulders. “Don’t worry about it Gin, we’ll all be up there sitting for our N.E.W.T.S next month and we’ll come visit for Hogsmeade weekends!” 

Mrs Weasley nudged her youngest son out of the way, her hands on Ginny’s shoulders as she tried to keep from crying. “You be good this year and enjoy it, dear. It’ll be the holidays before you know it.” She pulled the younger woman into a tight hug before letting her go reluctantly as the train sounded and Ginny gave Harry one last kiss before launching herself in the direction of the train and disappearing. 

Ron turned on his heel and drew the attention to himself with a grin. “Alright, who’s down to go and see Sirius at the Leaky Cauldron?”

\--

The Weasley parents declined a visit to the Leaky Cauldron, Molly wanting to get home and get a headstart on jumpers for Christmas, but Hermione knew she was going home to cry privately over her last child finishing up at Hogwarts. She couldn’t blame her really, even with the war won, it was still difficult to think of Hogwarts as the safest place on Earth after everything that happened. That left Harry, Ron and Hermione to take up a booth in the corner of the pub as Sirius pulled up a chair to chat insisting Tom didn’t need him for a bit. They’d made it to their third round when Neville had appeared followed by Dean and Seamus, the latter two whose hands were intertwined as they squeezed into the booth. 

“Alright there you three, what can I get you?” Sirius smirked and extricated him from the chair he’d been straddling, wandering off to the bar to gather drinks as the three newcomers settled in. “Sirius seems to be settling in well.” Neville had spent some time at Grimmauld Place and had clocked the difference in Sirius’s disposition, noting that the man did seem to be much more alive than he had been before. Harry turned, missing the way Hermione’s gaze seemed to linger on Sirius’ back longer than appropriate, “Yeah, he’s really coming round to this. I worried it might be too much, but I think he’s gonna handle it just fine. As long as no one gives him too much hell about his pardoning.”

Hermione was grateful that she was against the wall of the booth because the sight of Sirius in his stupidly tight jeans was a stark contrast to some of the robed magic folk scattered around and it had her brain buzzing. Something was different, it had been for months now, but she couldn’t put her finger on it and she couldn’t deny that it bothered her. Thankfully she wasn’t able to dwell too hard as the sound of Neville’s voice made her jump slightly. 

“Isn’t that Hannah Abbott?” He gestured to the blonde who’d taken up a seat at the bar, turning to motion for Dean and Seamus to let him out. He let his long legs carry him to the bar, gesturing to the empty seat next to the witch with a sheepish grin. “Is this seat taken?” Hermione watched with an amused expression before she was swept into the conversation the boys started having, heatedly debating the likelihood of Puddlemere United going far in the league now that Oliver Wood was the captain. 

Neville lay his hands on the bar and clasped them together to keep from fidgeting. Sirius raised a questioning eyebrow as he set the younger wizards drink down in front of him before moving to tend to a new patron. As he shifted in his seat slightly, Neville was greeted by the radiant smile of a blonde witch. He’d fancied her for ages, but blimey if he didn’t know how to go from here. Hannah blessedly took the lead and the lilt of her voice helped calm his nerves, “What brings you to this side of the bar? I saw Harry and the rest of them crammed into a ridiculously small booth and figured you’d be with them. Though I don’t know why they didn’t find something with more space, sitting on top of each other can’t be comfortable.” 

As she spoke, they took in the sight of Dean and Seamus who were actually sitting on each other as Dean had pulled the smaller wizard into his lap. Chuckling, they turned back around and Neville gave her a lopsided grin. “Oh, I uh, just wanted to see how things had been for you since, well, you know…” She nodded and curled her fingers around the frosty glass in front of her, a small sigh passing her lips.

“I’ve been handling things, spent some time with family in the south of France, but I realized I needed to come back and figure out my next steps. Not that I’ve made it so far as to figure out what those actually are, but I started thinking a job might be a good place to begin, but I’ve not had luck in settling on something. I don’t want to work for the Ministry and as much as I enjoy the shops, I didn’t really want to consider being a shop girl.” 

He understood, everything was so up in the air still and sometimes it was hard to see where pieces of the puzzle were supposed to fall. “I start Auror training later this month and I’m just glad the Minister reached out to me. I almost wondered if maybe I should have gone back to Hogwarts, but I’m not ready to face those hallways just yet.” 

As they chatted, Sirius sidled up to a halt in front of them, eyeing them with interest. “Did I hear correctly you’re looking for a job?” Hannah started, confused as to how he’d even heard their conversation when he’d been so far away, but she pushed the question aside and gave him a furtive smile. “I am. Why, you have some place in mind?” His smile widened and he could see the wheels turning in Neville’s head, wondering if the young man would get there. “Actually, I am. How good are you at charms?”

“I did get an Outstanding, so I like to think I’m rather decent.” The line of questioning hadn’t made her feel any less confused but she figured she’d indulge him and he’d get to the point eventually. “Refill this glass?” He pushed an empty glass towards her and nodded appreciatively as she tapped it with her wand and watched as it filled with firewhiskey. 

“Well then Miss…” He realized in that moment that he didn’t actually know her name and he faltered for a moment before the blonde took pity on him. “Abbott.” “Well then Miss Abbott, if you’re interested, you’ve got a job as a barkeep.” Hannah couldn’t help the way her eyebrows furrowed together at his words. 

“Forgive me, but you don’t know me. Who’s to say I’m not a murderer or some blood supremacist?” Sirius leveled her with a stare that had her realizing how stormy gray eyes could actually get when the sight of him jabbing a thumb in Neville’s direction caught her gaze. “If Longbottom here can talk to you without a wand in his hand, I assume you’re a good witch. Besides, haven’t you heard? I was once accused of mass murder?” He chuckled and spread his hands on the bar, watching her intently, “So, yes or no, do you want a job?”

She hesitated only a moment, chewing on her lip thoughtfully before nodding. “I’ll take it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments and kudos and bookmarks mean the world and I love seeing them, so please feel free to drop some more!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter kind of got away from me, but i'm happy with where things are going. yes this is a slow burn but listen, i have plans and eventually these two will have to own up to their feelings, so it's a semi slow burn that might not be as slow burn as it could because i myself am an impatient creature. 
> 
> also, am i playing loose with some stuff that happened during the hogwarts years? absolutely. it also gives me a reason to want to write some one shots set in this universe so. 
> 
> OH. If you're a fan of some marauders era ships, i have a drabble i wrote about sirius and dorcas meadowes posted and i'd love for you guys to show it some love!
> 
> (as per usual, i have no beta, so all mistakes are my own.)
> 
> *update, there is now a one shot that gives the backstory for the mention of Hermione and /a certain someone who pops up in this chapter/ up on my page called Halfway Fell. 
> 
> Please go give it a read once you’ve read this chapter!

**September 5th, 1998**

Hermione glanced at the piece of parchment in her hands for what felt like the fifteenth time. It wasn’t as if it held the most important words she’d ever seen, but it did contain the last piece of her time at Hogwarts. They’d all known they would be able to sit for their exams at some point in October, McGonagall had said as much last time she’d spoken to them, but now they had an actual date and she was starting to feel the beginnings of stress wrapping it’s tendrils around her stomach. 

If pressed she could probably take her N.E.W.T.S right now and still pass every single one, but for as much as she hadn’t wanted to finish her last year, this made everything even more final. Harry and Ron were starting their Auror training next week and she wondered vaguely if they would be able to pull off training and studying for their exams, but she also knew in the back of her mind that exams were just a formality for them. They and Neville were shoo-ins for the Aurors as war heroes, and try as she might, she couldn’t begrudge them that for all they had been through. If the stream of letters filled with job offers she’d received over the last few months were any indication, it was just a formality for her too, but there was no way Hermione Granger would take a job without proving she deserved it. 

And she was still holding out for Kingsley to get back to her, something she tried to push to the back of her mind to keep it from completely consuming her waking thoughts. It had already seeped into her nightmares, visions of Kingsley laughing at her as she was turned away from the Ministry falling into rotation with the rest of them. If she was going to do well enough to distract herself until she knew what her next step was, she needed to throw herself into studying which meant she needed to make a trip to Flourish and Blotts. 

She pushed herself off her bed with a quiet huff and strode to her wardrobe pulling out a pair of jean shorts and a thin jumper before stripping out of her oversized sleep shirt she’d nicked from Harry at some point and her cotton shorts. It didn’t take her long to get dressed, pulling on a worn pair of converse as she stumbled to the mirror to try and make something out of her mess of curls. Deciding to just pin the sides back to try and keep it out of her face, she grabbed her beaded bag and slung it over her shoulder before making her way down the stairs, cringing as the sounds of _ “MUDBLOOD, BLOOD TRAITORS, STAIN ON OUR LEGACY” _ began to filter past the curtains that had sprung open amidst her footfalls. 

“Come off it Walburga. You might as well accept that you’re stuck with me, dirty blood and all.” With a wave of her wand, her lips curled into a wicked grin as Walburga’s voice disappeared. She was thankful she’d never had to meet the actual woman, but Merlin was she grateful Sirius was nothing like the majority of his family. Making a mental note to try and find another way to remove the portrait at some point soon, she paused for just a moment before flinging a handful of floo powder into the fireplace and stepping into the flames, her destination falling from her lips.   
  


\-- 

Sirius was behind the bar wiping at a particularly stubborn spot while Hannah worked the floor, clearing tables with her wand and chatting to a group of older witches. Admittedly he had taken a chance on hiring someone he knew nothing about, but if Longbottom trusted her, that told him enough. And he’d talked to Harry and Hermione who had given her glowing reviews and mentioned she had been a part of Dumbledore’s Army so he was feeling pretty confident in his choice, all things considered. 

He had also caught on to the fact that Neville was nursing what might have been the world’s biggest crush on the blonde witch, if him hanging around the pub and finding reasons to make small talk with her had been any indication. He filed that information for later, and had turned to a patron at the other end of the bar when a familiar head of wild chestnut brown curls popped out from the floo. 

“Hermione! I didn’t know you would be popping in. Care for a drink?” At this sound of his voice, her head snapped up and she grinned loosely before striding over to sit at the bar. His eyes took in her legs in her shorts and he bit the inside of his cheek, levitating a drink to the man at the other end of the bar as she slid onto a stool. 

“Yes, please. I figured I’d start on studying for exams next month, but I realized there’s a few books I need from Flourish and Blotts and since Harry is off somewhere with Ron, I thought I could just make a day of it in Diagon. I’ll probably stop in and see Fred and George, see how the shop is doing.” She wrapped her fingers around the glass Sirius set in front of her and took a sip, reveling in the warmth the firewhiskey left in its wake. 

Sirius leaned against the bar with his hip, his arms crossed over his chest, listening intently as she listed off her plans. “I keep meaning to go down to Weasley’s, but I haven’t had a chance yet. I’m sure Fred is happy to be out of Molly’s reach.” 

Hermione snorted quietly and nodded her head, a small smile dancing on her lips. “I can’t say I blame Mrs Weasley for wanting to keep him close, he did almost die. But I know he’s ready to try and move past it and George just doesn’t want anyone to bring it up around either of them.”

“I think at this point, everyone is ready to try and move past it.” His eyes darkened slightly and Hermione reached a hand across the bar, letting it rest gently on his forearm. She knew that he was still having trouble sleeping, the lasting effects of the Department of Mysteries keeping him in it’s grasp, they’d both spent the last two nights curled up on opposite ends of the couch and she wished there was more she could do for him. For all of them really considering Harry and Ron were faring no better than they were. 

“Alright there Hermione?” 

As the sound of Hannah’s voice came from behind her, she pulled her hand back and let it curl around her glass once more, a distinct feeling of having been caught doing something inappropriate lingering at the front of her mind. As she swiveled to see Hannah better, she caught a flash of what looked like annoyance? Dejection? flit across Sirius’ features, but she didn’t have much time to process as she pulled Hannah into the conversation. 

“I see Sirius hasn’t run you off yet.” Hermione shot him a cheeky grin and he rolled his eyes, shaking his head at her and huffing dramatically. 

“I’ll have you know, kitten, I am an angel of a boss.” Both witches let out a peal of giggles and Hannah hopped over the bar to settle in next to Sirius, bumping him with her hip as she grabbed a rag. 

“Absolutely. You’re a complete angel, truly I don’t know how you manage to be so perfect and I thank my lucky stars every day Neville told you I wasn’t the worst witch in existence.” 

“What can I say, It’s a gift.” 

As the girls caught each other's eyes, the fit of giggles started all over and Hannah moved away from them, patting Sirius on the head as she went. He tried to look offended but only made it to mild irritation before he was refilling Hermione’s glass, a thinly disguised smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth. 

Hermione shook her head trying to move a wayward curl from her cheeks, pursing her lips to blow air at it in a vain attempt before Sirius found himself reaching across the bar to brush it behind her ear, his fingers trailing softly against the curve of her cheek. She felt the blood rush to her face and lowered her eyes for a moment, missing the glance Sirius gave her that was far more loaded than she could have guessed as she tried to focus on something other than the warmth that bloomed in her lower stomach.

Wrapping her fingers around the glass, she brought it to her lips before giving him a small smile, trying to move the conversation back to a safer spot instead of trying to decipher her current feelings towards the wizard in front of her. “So where’s Tom? I thought you said he was sticking around for another month?”

“He decided to give me a free day to see if I could handle it on my own before he left. It’s been nice and Hannah has really been a great addition. Though if Longbottom spends any more time here, I may have to offer him a job too.”

At the mention of Neville, she arched an eyebrow, “Has he been in a lot then?”

“You could say that. Or I could tell you that he’s got it so bad for Hannah and can’t seem to want to be anywhere else but with her. He comes in every night when he’s done with whatever he’s doing and sits until we close. I’ve half a mind to start a betting pool and see how long it takes for him to ask her out or for her to tell him to bugger off, but she seems to like the attention.” He chuckled as he watched Hannah toss her rag in the air and catch it before clambering back over the bar to check on a table. 

“It does make sense though. Hannah is sweet but she’d got a little kick to her that I think would be good for Neville. I’ll take that bet. Five Galleons says they’ll be together by Halloween.” She downed her drink and slid it towards him, her lips split into a grin. 

“I give him until the end of the month. Something tells me he’s gonna come to his senses soon.”

She slid off the stool and inclined her head. “You’re on. But no meddling. You have an unfair advantage that you’re around them both.”

He placed a hand over his heart and sighed dramatically, “You wound me, witch. I would never meddle.”

“Right, and I’m the Queen of England.” She let out a snort and pushed the stool back in before motioning her head towards the door, “I’m off. It’s high time I lose myself in the stacks at Flourish and Blotts. I’ll see you later.”

“I’ll bring takeaway?” She waved her hand at him in what he assumed was a yes and he watched as she made her way out the doors, shaking his head to clear his thoughts as he turned to refill someone’s drink.

\--

Diagon Alley was relatively empty as Hermione made her way down the cobblestone street, glancing into shop fronts and trying to remember to keep her face away from any expression that would look horrid in a photo in case she ended up in the Prophet or Witch Weekly. Headlines touting her surliness were not what she was looking to read over the next few days.

Slipping into the entrance of Weasleys Wizard Wheezes as she made the decision to hit the bookstore last, she couldn’t help but grin at the shop that had been restored to its pre-war glory. The bright colors and noisy chatter wrapping her in a warmth she almost didn’t expect. As she ran a hand across a few boxes of Skivving Snackboxes, her attention was stolen by the sound of a voice calling her name. “Hermione! To what do we owe the pleasure of this visit?”

Even before George had lost his ear and Fred found himself with new scars of his own, Hermione could always tell the two apart and she launched herself at Fred with a giggle, wrapping her arms around his waist with a sigh. “Do I have to have a reason to visit two of my favorite Weasleys?”

“You flatter me so, Granger.” He slipped his arms from her shoulders to hold her at arm's length, eyes searching her features. “Lee can handle the front for a minute, George is in the back and he’d love to see you.” 

Hermione let Fred lead her towards the back room, pushing aside the thick orange velvet curtain that separated the shop from the workshop, a blissful silence settling over them as the silencing spell she knew was weaved into the fabric of the curtain took hold. George glanced up from the cauldron he was hovering over, tendrils of smoke framing his face. 

“Granger! To what do we owe the pleasure?” 

She rolled her eyes and hoisted herself up onto the edge of Fred’s desk, letting her legs swing free. “Fred said the same thing and honestly, I’m a little cross the two of you don’t think I can just pop in and say hello.”

Fred leaned against his desk, his shoulder brushing hers lightly as he chuckled. “You know you’re always welcome. If you’re bored enough, I’m sure Verity wouldn’t mind relinquishing control of the registers to give you something to do.”

Her brow furrowed slightly as George nodded vehemently before turning back to the cauldron, stirring intently. “Actually, that doesn’t sound like a horrid idea. I’m still waiting to hear back from the Minister and I truly don’t know how much more I can take of just sitting in Sirius’s library. I think I’ve read every book. Though, I am going to have to write a schedule out for studying. I may not be finishing at Hogwarts but I still plan on getting O’s in my exams.”

Fred leaned over and placed a loud kiss into her curls as George snorted. “Granger, you’re an absolute swot but you’re going to knock your N.E.W.Ts out of the park and you know it. 

“Calling me a swot and following it with a compliment is not the way to win my affections Fred Weasley. It’s like you’re trying to take a page out of Ron’s book. Don’t make me tell Percy he’s my favorite.”

“You wouldn’t dare. You might be a swot, but Percy is a prat and I’m wounded you’d stoop so low as to threaten me.” 

She planted a kiss on his cheek before sliding off the desk and crossing the floor to George before doing the same to him. “I’m off to Flourish and Blotts, so I can continue my swotty ways. I’ll let you know if I decide to take you up on your offer, but I’ll see you for Sunday dinner, yeah?” 

Both twins gave her loose grins as she held the curtain open, their voices a chorus as they spoke together, “Sunday it is, Granger.”

As she stepped back out into the hustle and bustle of the shop, she gave Lee and Verity a little wave before stepping out into the slightly quieter Alley. As her feet tread the familiar path, her mind wandered without the distraction of the twins, gray eyes and curly black hair swimming across her vision. Something had shifted between her and Sirius and as much as she wanted (and planned) to deny the way her body was betraying her, she couldn’t ignore the fact that she wanted to curl up into his side and tangle her fingers in his hair. 

Something she decidedly shouldn’t want from her best friend's godfather, a man who probably still saw her as the insufferable sixteen year old she used to be. Hermione was content to continue whatever they were doing, finding comfort in each other’s brokenness, knowing that was all this was. Two broken people finding solace in one another. Her fingers ghosted across her cheek where he’d brushed her curl back and she cursed inwardly as she pushed the door open to the bookstore, pushing thoughts of infuriatingly handsome wizards to the back of her mind as she lost herself in the bookshelves.

\--

**September 12th, 1998**

If you asked Sirius what he wanted out of life, once upon a time he would have said he wanted to leave a legacy behind that was more than just his name, to prove he could make something of himself beyond the Ancient and Most Noble House of Black. Now he’d tell you he just wanted to live. He’d spent so much of his life fighting against dark wizards, losing friends and holding on to his sanity in Azkaban that anything less than just living his life without fear of succumbing to the darkness sounded terrible. 

He knew he wasn’t the same man he used to be. He couldn’t be given the circumstances, but despite having found himself more grounded in his brokenness, there was still a hint of the cocky, self assured wizard that had once been so full of eagerness. A lot of it was largely due to the curly haired witch who currently had her feet in his lap as she scanned the book perched on her knees, a sugar quill stuck between her teeth. Not that she was aware of how much she’d helped him, especially in the aftermath of the war, when she’d taken it upon herself to help him through his nightmares. 

He knew she suffered from her own and he cursed himself frequently knowing his cousin played such a large part in them and he couldn’t fix it, but he was content enough to sit in silence with her as they tried to work through their own demons. The smell of lemongrass and cloves that clung to her had become a safety net for him and even in his darkest moments, it could bring him a sense of peace. 

Sirius would deny it and he had, on numerous occasions to Remus who was too observant for his own good, but he knew the feelings he had for Hermione weren’t familial. He’d spent countless hours trying to fight the way he felt, knowing he could never pursue her. Not only was she vivacious and sarcastic and wonderful, she deserved someone less broken. Someone who could give her what he couldn’t. She was so young, with her whole life ahead of her and he couldn’t see how he fit into that.

His eyes traced the curves of her face, taking in the slight scrunch of her nose as she read, the way her curls fell around her shoulders and the chocolate color of her eyes that seemed to shimmer like firewhiskey from the flames of the fireplace. Before he could get too lost in committing every last piece of her to memory, the flames roared and his godson stepped out, shaking the soot from his Junior Auror robes before flopping down into a chair. 

“I love it, I can’t wait to do it all over again tomorrow but bloody hell, I’m exhausted.”

Hermione popped the sugar quill out of her mouth and Sirius had to bite back the groan that threatened to tumble from his lips, burying his face in the glass of firewhiskey in his hand to remind himself to focus on Harry and not things he shouldn’t be thinking about his best friend. 

“I can imagine they’re going to run you all ragged with how accelerated it is. What do Ron and Neville think?” Hermione mused as she marked her page in the ancient runes book before setting it on the floor. 

“They’re both as exhausted as I am, but we got assigned partners today and of course they stuck me with Ron, but Neville is with Oliver Wood.” 

Hermione couldn’t help the look of confusion that crossed her features and she cocked her head to the side, curls tumbling over her shoulder. “Wait, I thought Oliver was still with Puddlemere?”

Harry chuckled and shook his head as he maneuvered himself out of his robes, letting them pool to the floor at his feet. “He decided after the battle of Hogwarts that he wanted to do something more. He was still a reserve Keeper and he felt his talents could be used elsewhere.”

“You don’t still have a thing for Oliver do you?”

Her eyes widened and Sirius couldn’t help the jealousy that nipped at his veins at her reaction. 

“Harry James. I should never have told you about that. Especially if you’re going to bring it up now that he’s back. He and I had our… thing and that was the end of it.”

Sirius knew he shouldn’t have pressed it, but his curiosity got the better of him and he raised an eyebrow, “You had a thing with a quidditch player?”

She sighed and shifted, crossing her ankles in his lap, “Sixth year, he came in to watch one of the Gryffindor matches to show support for Harry and he and I ended up in his room while he was staying in Hogsmeade. It was a one time thing and he and I are just friends.” 

She pointed her finger at Harry, trying to ignore the fact that she’d just told the man she was trying to ignore that she had feelings for that she’d hooked up with someone. She was fully aware Sirius had had his fair share of trysts but she wasn’t looking to bring up any of hers. “And you had better not try anything. I don’t want you to play matchmaker with Oliver. I’m perfectly fine with how things are right now.”

Harry threw his hands up in a gesture of truce as he gave her a roguish grin. “Alright fine, I won’t meddle. Though he did ask about you.”

Sirius’ fingers tightened around his glass, but he slapped a smirk on his face and leaned forward. “You should go for it, love. Get out of the house, go on a date.”

“I do not want to go on a date. Honestly, Oliver and I are just friends and the both of you can stop before I hex you.”

Harry and Sirius shared a look before they both shrugged slightly, Harry loosening the tie around his neck. “Hermione, you can’t just bury yourself in your textbooks until you hear from Kingsley. Let yourself have a distraction, it won’t hurt you.”

“I’m going to bed, you two can stay up and prattle on about how I need distractions all you want, but I want no part of it. Good night.” And with that she let her feet slide off of Sirius’ lap as she gathered her book and her mug in her hands and stalked off up the stairs. 

Sirius sighed and rubbed his free hand across his chin. “Maybe lay off the dating thing? Apparently it’s a touchy subject.”

“You’d think she’d want to get out after things fell apart with Ron. He’s certainly thrown himself into dating. Or more like shagging whoever he can, but I just want them both to be happy.”

Sirius’ eyes drifted towards the stairs and he nodded. “I know the feeling.”

\--

**September 19th, 1998**

The evening of her nineteenth birthday came with only a small amount of fan fare. She’d decided to have something relatively small at Grimmauld Place, happy to be surrounded by the Weasleys and her friends. She leaned against the wall of the living room, taking in the faces that seemed more relaxed than she’d seen in a long time. 

Harry was lounging on the couch, Ginny perched in his lap as he, Neville, Oliver and Ron recounted stories from their first week of training as Luna and and Tonks listened, the latter inserting her own stories from her training. 

Remus was bouncing Teddy gently in his arms, the five month old babbling happily as Sirius and Bill were immersed in a deep conversation about the merits of running a pub. Fleur had managed to convince Molly to help her in the kitchen much to Molly’s chagrin while the twins were trying to sneak food from the trays without their mother noticing and Hermione couldn’t help but giggle quietly.

This was what she wanted. She didn’t want bells and whistles and loud festivities. She wanted to enjoy time with people she cared about without wondering if they were going to survive. Her eyes flitted towards Sirius who caught her gaze. As he straightened up to walk over to her, the floo sprang to life and everyone turned as the Minister stepped out and into the room, Sirius pausing mid step. 

“I hope I’m not intruding, but I have some news that I figured I could deliver to the birthday girl in person instead of through a letter.” 

Hermione’s spine straightened and she held her breath and Kingsley closed the distance between them and pulled a piece of parchment from his pocket, extending it as she wrapped her fingers around it and pulled it towards her, unsure if she could actually speak. 

“I’ve had time to consider your proposal and I’ve decided to extend an offer for you to join the DMLE, in a different capacity of course than those in the Auror program. There is a research specialist position that has come available and it would let you work in the Wizengamot Administrative Services. You’d be able to work on legislature and policy reform as well as occasionally being able to present in front of the Wizengamot. This is a very select position as there are only two available so you and your partner would both be working closely and you would only have the department head and myself to report to.”

Before she could register what she was doing, Hermione had flung herself at the Minister, arms wrapping around his waist as he let out a deep chuckle. 

“I’ll take that as an acceptance then?”

“Oh Merlin, I’m so sorry. Yes, yes I would love that!” 

“I know you’ve got exams next month, so you wouldn’t need to start until those are finished, but your office will be ready and waiting.”

Hermione let her arms drop from his waist, containing the squeal that was dangerously close to setting itself free from her throat. Letting herself breathe for a moment, she smiled up at him brightly. “Thank you. This is truly more than I could have wanted and I look forward to being able to help work through some policy reform. And please, stay for cake. I’d love nothing more!”

He gestured to the parchment in her hands, “That is just a rundown of the position and your start date. The Ministry looks forward to having you on board.”

He sidestepped towards the kitchen as Arthur popped out from the dining room and Hermione settled back against the wall. For the first time in months, she felt like she had a purpose and knowing she was going to be able to work towards getting rid of some of the archaic laws was probably the best birthday gift she could have gotten. 

As the night wore down and people offered their congratulations as they stepped into the floo, Hermione found herself thankful for having so many people in her life that cared. She was essentially a war orphan, but for as much as she wished she could talk to her parents, she at least had her chosen family to share her good news with. 

When the only people left were Harry and Ginny who’d retired to Harry’s room and her and Sirius, she trudged up the stairs and let herself collapse on the couch in the study, happy to have a moment to collect her thoughts. Her eyes and just shifted closed when a knock on the door frame popped them open. She smiled lazily as Sirius leaned against the wood, a small box in his hands. 

“Mind if I join you? I seem to remember I still haven’t given you your gift.”

She gestured towards the couch she was sprawled across and she readjusted so he could slide into the empty space beside her. “You didn’t have to get me anything.”

“I wanted to though. And besides, this is something I had laying around in my vault.” 

She reached out and wrapped her fingers around the box, eyebrow quirked as she opened it, a quiet gasp falling from her lips. The gleam of the goblin made metal stood in contrast to the deep purple amethysts the glittered along the band. Her thumb brushed against the cool metal and her eyes found Sirius’.

“Sirius this is… this is beautiful but I can’t. This is way too much.” 

“You deserve this and more and I won’t take it back. Wear it or not, but a witch like you deserves pretty things and my family name might not be worth much, but if I can put some of these inherited things to good use, I’m happy to do it for you.”

He pulled the box from her hand and slipped the bangle free, reaching for her wrist. She hesitated only for a moment before letting him slip it on. It really was beautiful and the weight of it felt comforting against her skin. She ignored the flash of red hair that seemed to pause in the doorway before it was out of her sight as she leaned forward to wrap her arms around Sirius’ neck and hide her smile in his hair, blinking rapidly to clear the tears that clouded her vision. 

She knew he probably had enough jewelry in his vaults to not feel bad about giving some away, but for now, she’d tuck the thought away that maybe, he’d wanted her to have it because he felt the same way she did. Hermione knew he was just being nice, but lost in her own thoughts, she didn’t notice the way his shoulders relaxed as he breathed in the scent of lemongrass and cloves that invaded his senses. 

“Happy birthday, Hermione.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> your comments and kudos seriously warm my heart. and shoutout to my return readers and return commenters (shoutout drea10 and issy_l), you guys make me a happy little bean.


	5. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me start off by apologizing for how long it's taken me to get this chapter out. I've been working on it off and on since August and it's been a bitch of a chapter. I did recently join a fic discord and shout out to all the people who ran sprints with me because that's what helped me finally get this done. 
> 
> i still don't have a concrete idea on how long this fic will be, but i've got the majority of it plotted out so if you stick with me, i'm determined to see this through to the end, even if it takes me awhile to get there.
> 
> also if you’re interested, i posted the scene where hermione and oliver hook up that was mentioned in the last chapter. it’s titled halfway fell and maybe at some point i’ll make a collection for this and the eventual neville/hannah i have planned. 
> 
> also all mistakes are mine so like if you see a glaring error feel free to correct me.

**October 9th, 1998**

The rest of September passed in a blur as everyone tried to find their footing and by the time anyone realized, October had arrived. Sirius had officially taken over The Leaky Cauldron and Tom had started his retirement somewhere warm and sunny on the continent and away from London. Hermione had settled into her study routine, thankful for Sirius who made sure she was actually eating and not just wasting away in the Black library after Harry and Ron informed Sirius of how she’d gotten during her O.W.Ls, Sirius even going so far as to enlist Seamus to bring her meals through the floo after the short Irishman had essentially taken up residence in the pub. 

Harry and Ron joined her a few times to study but they spent most of their time focusing specifically on potions which both men were mildly concerned might be their undoing. As Aurors, it was something they both knew they needed to pay close attention to because their training had an entire section dedicated to deadly potions and the needed antidotes and potions were neither of their strong suits. If Hermione had the thought that maybe if they’d paid attention more during class they might be less worried, well, she kept that to herself. 

For the first time in her magical academic career, Hermione wasn’t actually as stressed over her studying as she’d imagined she’d be. Sure she’d had a few sleepless nights but she chalked those up to nightmares and the need to keep her mind occupied so she fell back on her notes, but on the whole she felt more at ease than the last few years. Maybe it was because she was studying on her own terms without classes to split her focus, or maybe it was the time spent with Sirius after he’d closed the pub where he would sit and quiz her, happy to remind the curly haired witch that he’d done rather impressively on his own N.E.W.Ts., thank you very much. 

Curled up on the couch in the library, Hermione had surrounded herself with books and parchment as she tapped the end of a sugar quill against her lips, enjoying the quiet of the townhouse. Living with Harry and Sirius was one of the few good things that had come out of the war and for as much as she missed her parents and ached to have them back in her life, she was thankful for her boys. _Her boys_. She wasn’t sure when she’d started including Sirius as one of her boys along with Harry and Ron, but she couldn’t say it bothered her or that it didn’t feel wholly and completely right. 

Sirius had slipped himself into her everyday life and she found herself basking in the warmth he brought with him. Sure he was frustrating and sometimes far to cavalier and could grate on her last nerve, but the solace he provided when they were both struggling with their own demons was something she couldn’t imagine letting go of. 

She also wasn’t sure when she’d truly started to see Sirius as more than just Harry’s godfather and the man who’d opened up his home to her. There was the thought that of course she’d had a silly schoolgirl crush on him when she’d spent the summer of her fifth year in Grimmauld, but that had faded… or so she’d figured. Maybe she was just better at shoving it to the back of her mind because there was no way a man like Sirius Black would ever see her as more than the swotty, opinionated best friend of his godson. 

Adjusting her body so she had a leg kicked out across the couch, she sucked on the sugar quill, the taste of lemon coating her tongue. If anything, the crush she’d tried to deny on Sirius had formed itself into a full blown infatuation and she thanked the gods regularly she was at a point she could still act normal around him. If he’d known the rather explicit images she had of him in her head, he would have avoided her, no questions. 

Could she help it if she wanted to trace his tattoos with her tongue or pepper his stupidly attractive jawline with kisses? Sweet Circe she had it bad. All she could hope for at this point was to make it through her exams so she could spend more time at the Ministry than in the house. She had a feeling some distance might do her a world of good. 

“What’s got you so thoroughly distracted that you didn’t hear me come in?”

Hermione started, coughing lightly as she stabbed herself with the sugar quill, eyes narrowed as she stared at the wizard currently propped up against the door frame, one ankle kicked over the other. 

“Remus Lupin, don’t you know it’s rude to sneak up on someone?”

“Is it really sneaking if I wasn’t trying to be quiet?” He chuckled and waved a hand in her direction. “What’s got you so lost in thought? You can’t possibly be nervous for your exams, can you Miss Brightest Witch of Her Age.”

She huffed at the moniker and shuffled her parchment around, stacking it on the table before she waved her hand, the books righting themselves on the table. 

“I’m not _nervous_. Ready to be done with them for sure but I was… thinking of something else.” 

_Like untoward thoughts about your best friend_ , she thought to herself, thankful Remus wasn’t a mind reader. Though she did hope he couldn’t hear the staccato of her heartbeat as it pounded against her rib cage.

“A good something or bad something? I’m happy to listen if you’ve got things you need to work through.” Remus pushed himself off the door frame before crossing the room to drop bonelessly onto the couch next to her. 

Rolling her eyes with a slight smile, she shook her head. “More like a very frustrating something, but it’s nothing I can’t handle on my own.” 

There was no way Hermione was going to talk to Remus about her infatuation with Sirius. She couldn’t even imagine bringing it up to Tonks knowing she’d probably tease her mercilessly and then proceed to tell Remus who would inevitably bring it up to Sirius. And she couldn’t bring it up to Harry. She could just imagine how that would go. ‘Harry, just wanted to mention I’ve fallen head over heels for your godfather who I’ve known since I was fourteen.’

She scoffed and shook her head trying to ignore the inquisitive tilt of her former professors head. “I promise I’m fine. I’m also very ready to start this job at the Ministry. I’m hoping it’ll give me a chance to overturn some of these outdated laws.”

Remus raised an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth curling upwards. “If anyone can bring the wizarding world into the current century, I have no doubts it’ll be you. You’re going to great things Hermione. Now walk me through what you’re studying, I could use a refresher on Ancient Runes anyway.”

\--

**October 17th, 1998**

_Hermione’s heart dropped as she watched the only black curls of the crazed witch standing over her swing wildly, wand pointed at the younger witch as she shrieked over and over about the sword that should have been in her vault. Her body trembled as she felt the Cruciatus Curse rip through her body, the tremors violent as she let out a scream._

She thrashed around, legs tangled in the sheets as her eyes wrenched open. It took her a moment to realize she was in her own soft bed and not on the cold marble floor of the Manor’s drawing room. It took her a moment longer to realize that she wasn’t alone in her bed as she felt a cold nose nudge against her elbow with a soft whine. Taking in the sight of Padfoot curled up against her side, she cursed herself as she remembered she’d forgotten to cast a silencing charm. 

Carding her fingers through his fur, she sighed. “I didn’t mean to wake you. You don’t have to stay with me.”

She could have sworn she saw the dog roll his eyes and in response, Padfoot nudged her once more, this time against her shoulder, which she took as her cue to lay back down. Curling inwards, she kept her fingers in the coarse fur and let her eyes drift shut, Padfoot keeping watch as she slept. 

\--

**October 18th, 1998**

Hermione woke with the sun as the light filtered through a crack in her curtains, a hand coming to scrub the sleep from her eyes as she remembered the nightmare and the dog that was still curled up next to her. Slipping out of the bed, she grabbed clean clothes and stumbled to the shower before stripping out of her night clothes, piling them on the floor as she flicked the dials. Letting the water cascade over her hand, she sighed at the heat and stepped under the stream, the tightness in her muscles relaxing.

She took her time washing, scrubbing at her skin until it turned pink under the ministrations as she tried to keep the thoughts of her torture from seeping into her waking conscious. Washing her hair and letting the water caress her head until her curls were heavy against her back, she turned the water off and dried off, toweling her hair lightly before getting dressed in a pair of leggings and a t-shirt she’d nicked from Sirius, the faded Black Sabbath logo loose across her chest. 

Sending her dirty clothes into the hamper with a flick of her wrist, she wandered back down the hall and into her room, startled to find Sirius propped up against her pillows, his pajama bottoms slung low on his hips and his own faded t-shirt loose from years of washing. 

“Thank you for staying last night, but you didn’t have too. I guess I was so knackered from studying I forgot the silencing charm.”

“It was fine, love. I’ve told you before and I’ll say it again, let someone take care of you. You don’t need the silencing charms. Harry and I both understand. Besides, it’s not exactly a chore to feel like I can help a pretty witch get a good night's sleep. Plus it helps me too, to be completely honest.”

Hermione felt her cheeks flush at his words. _His flirting really doesn’t help this infatuation, especially when I know it’s just how he is_. She sighed internally as she flopped down on the bed beside him, folding her legs into a pretzel as she watched him. 

“I keep thinking that maybe I’m okay and then they come out of nowhere. I always wake up feeling the effects of the curse even though it’s been months. I don’t know if I’ll ever stop feeling it.” She twisted her hair into a bun on her head and stuck her wand through it to hold it as she avoided looking him in the eyes.

Her head snapped up at the feel of his hand on knee and he gave her a sad smile. “You know, the first time my mother Crucio’d me in my father’s study, I was thirteen and I thought the same thing. It took almost a year for the tremors to fully go away and I was only under it for a few minutes. The second time she did it was the night I ran away to James’ and I was sixteen. It lasted almost an hour before I could get away and I thought Dorea was going to take on Walburga on her own. It was another year and a half before my hands finally stopped shaking. What I’m trying to say is, in time, it won’t feel like it happened yesterday. You will get past it and I’ll be here whenever you need someone to lean on.” 

Hermione sat silent for a moment before she launched herself into Sirius’ arms and buried her face in his shoulder, tears on her cheeks. “If I could, I would take on Walburga for you.” 

He tangled his fingers in her hair, breathing deeply before letting out a quiet chuckle. “I have a feeling Walburga wouldn’t have stood a chance against you, witch.” 

They sat in the silence, taking comfort from each other for awhile before Sirius moved to extricate himself from Hermione’s arms. “As much as I’d like to stay here, I do have to get to the Leaky at some point today. I don’t want to leave Hannah alone for too long and Seamus has probably already taken up his spot at the bar while Dean is at work. At this point I might as well find something productive for him to do with his time, though I haven’t quite worked out what I can do with him yet.”

She let out a watery giggle and resumed her cross legged position. “Just don’t let him near anything that might could explode. He’s damn good at making things go boom that shouldn’t.”

Sirius chuckled as he turned to leave the room, “I’ll keep that in mind. How about you come by later and we can see if Harry and Ron can be spared for lunch?”

“I’d like that.” She gave him a soft smile before throwing herself back against the pillows, wondering just what she was going to do with herself. 

Sirius closed the door to his room and leaned against it as he pinched the bridge of his nose, exhaling shakily as he tried to compose himself. He knew he was on dangerous ground, but he was having a hard time sticking to his reasons for ignoring his ever growing feelings for Hermione. Granted, there was no way she’d reciprocate the feelings even if he did let his own slip. She was too good for him in all the ways he was so wrong. She deserved someone whole and without all the baggage. 

What he needed was to talk to Remus, but if he did it would only confirm what Moony had been asking all along about Sirius’ feelings and he wasn’t entirely sure he could handle trying to figure them out. He could feel the urge to transform into Padfoot grow and instead of giving in, he shucked his pants off and pulled on a pair of dark gray fitted jeans and rifled through his closet, yanking a midnight blue button down and a black vest with embroidered silver swirls across the front. 

As he wrangled himself into the rest of his clothing and rolled his sleeves, he reached down and stuffed his feet into socks and his dragonhide boots before slipping his wand into its holster under the shirt sleeve, trudging out of his bedroom and down the hall, calling a goodbye to Hermione before he threw himself into the floo. Yeah, avoiding his feelings was going to go just bloody fantastically for him.

\--

**October 26th, 1998**

The day of N.E.W.Ts testing dawned dark and stormy, the winter chill beginning it’s slow creep into the corners of Grimmauld Place. Fortunately for Hermione (and Harry and Ron) they’d received an owl in the early hours of the morning informing them that they would be able to floo directly into the headmistresses office instead of dealing with the weather, something Hermione was very grateful for. 

“Hey Mione?” 

Her head popped up from where she was digging elbow deep in her beaded bag, eyes landing on Ron and Harry as they watched her from just inside the doorway of her room. 

“You two look extraordinarily guilty right now. Should I be worried?”

The two teens glanced at each other before Harry grimaced slightly as Ron gestured for him to speak. “I know we’re all doing dinner at the Leaky after we’re done at the school today, but there’s something we wanted to tell you before we told everyone at dinner.”

Hermione extracted her arm from her bag, eyebrows pulling together at his words. There was something in the way Harry spoke that had her feeling like she wasn’t going to like whatever they had to tell her and she clenched her jaw. 

Harry’s hand came up to the back of his head, ruffling the perpetually messy hair and he let out a sigh before he spoke again. “Kingsley has informed us that we’ll be leaving next week for training. The location is a secret and we won’t be able to send a lot of letters.”

“Well, I mean, that doesn’t sound too terrible. Of course I wish you weren’t going but I guess it makes sense that some of your training would be away from the Ministry. How long are you supposed to be gone for?”

“A year.”

An involuntary shriek fell from her lips as she looked between her two best friends, hoping that one of them would crack a smile and say “just kidding”, though the wince they both shared seemed to prove her wrong.

Words failed her and as the silence began to fester uncomfortably, Ron gave her his usual lopsided grin. “Just think, a year will go by so fast and at least this time, you won’t be stuck in a tent with us.”

She brought a hand up to rub along her jaw, letting out a slow exhale. “I’ve been with you for the past seven years, almost exclusively, including a year on the run with both of you and now you’re telling me we'll have to go an entire year apart?”

Harry closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around the petite witch, ignoring the sniffles as she buried her face in the crook of his neck. “No matter the distance, you will always be the piece that keeps us glued together. You’re a big part of the reason either of us is still around to even be able to do this. A year will go by in no time, especially with you finally getting the chance to show the Ministry idiots exactly how formidable the Brightest Witch of her Age actually is.”

Hermione let out a shaky chuckle as she felt Ron’s arms slide around the two of them and she let herself breathe in their scents. “A whole year without the two of you is going to be bloody awful, but I’ll find a way to cope, I guess.” She broke away from the hug and ran the heel of her hand against her cheeks, wiping away the traces of wetness from her tears. “We do still have tests to get through today, so let’s go to Hogwarts.”

Hurrying out the door and down to the sitting room before she started crying again, she tossed a handful of floo powder into the grate, stepped in and called out ‘The Headmistresses Office, Hogwarts’ and disappeared into the flames. 

Stumbling into the office, she righted herself and stepped away from the grate before siphoning the soot off her clothes, a smile on her lips as she heard the headmistress speak. “Miss Granger, I trust Mister Potter and Mister Weasley will be along shortly?”

“Yes Professor. They shouldn’t be too far behind me. Am I the first then?” She glanced around the office, taking in the differences from the last time she’d been in, noting the distinct lack of knick knacks. 

“You are, but I’m certain everyone else will be here soon. There are a few others taking their exams with you three as well. If you’d like to wait you can, we’ll be using one of the older classrooms on the sixth floor since it’s a smaller group. No need to spread you out in the Great Hall if there’s only twenty five of you. 

Nodding, Hermione absently twirled a curl around her finger, wondering who else from her year would be taking the exams with them today. The grate sparked to life and Harry tumbled out followed quickly by Ron, both giving McGonagall wide grins. “Nice to see you three looking so prepared. If you’d like Miss Granger, lead these two up to the sixth floor. Professor Flitwick will be overseeing your exams alongside a few Ministry officials and they’ll be waiting.”

With a nod, Hermione led them out into the hallway and looped her arms through theirs. “It still feels weird that we’re not students here anymore. But as much as I thought I would, I don’t miss it.”

Harry chuckled, “I get what you mean. Hogwarts doesn’t feel the same as it used to but with everything that happened, I guess I should have expected it. I don’t think I could have spent every day in class remembering everything that we went through that night, if I’m honest.”

“I feel like I should be in class right now, but wandering the halls does feel a bit like old times. Who knows where we’ll end up years down the line, maybe one of us we’ll wind up back here.” Ron snorted as Hermione pulled the two of them through the corridor and into the room Flitwick directed them into. “Let’s be real, if it’s any of us, it won’t be me. Can you imagine? Me as a professor?”

The trio tried to reign in their laughter as they took in what looked like a mini amphitheater. A small raised stage in the front of the room was surrounded by stone benches that had desktops spelled to float above them. Each desk had parchment and quills placed on top spread out so no one was directly next to or in front of someone. 

They each took a seat and chatted as they waited for whoever else would be with them to pop in. Slowly the others wandered in and took seats of their own with Dean and Seamus taking seats in the row in front of them, followed by Neville and Hannah. Susan Bones wandered in with Padma Patil and Ernie MacMillan. There was quiet conversation between the groups and it seemed only Hermione noticed when Draco and Theodore Nott slipped into the room before claiming seats at the upper most corner. 

A few more students wandered in that Hermione could only vaguely place, but before she could think about it further, Professor Flitwick levitated himself onto a stack of books next to what she assumed was the Ministry official. As the two at the front spoke, Hermione chewed absently on the inside of her cheek. “You will be doing the paper version of your testing first. When you finish an exam you will raise your hand and your next test will be provided as you aren’t all taking the same N.E.W.Ts. After lunch you will do your practical testing and will be brought into the room one at a time. Parchment and quills are spelled to prevent cheating so please don’t attempt it. You may begin.”

Hermione buried herself into her exams, thankful she’d spent as much time studying as she had. Their year on the run might have helped hone her potions skills but she was the rustiest she’d ever been when it came to Transfiguration. After what felt like days, she placed her quill on the desktop and rolled her parchment, letting her final test be summoned to the front. Gathering her beaded bag from the floor, she slipped out into the hallway and sank down onto the cold stone of the castle floor to wait until everyone else was finished. 

She must have dozed off because the next moment someone was gently shaking her shoulder, a voice cutting across her subconscious. 

“-ione. I know you’re getting more sleep than usual during your review sessions so it can’t be the comfort of the stone ground luring you into drowsiness.”

A sheet of bright red hair dragged itself into focus and Hermione flung her arms around the youngest Weasley’s shoulder with a squeal. Living with Harry and seeing Ron and the rest of the guys from her year fairly frequently did wonders for her, but not getting to see Ginny or Luna often left her feeling in need of female company often. 

“You try getting a decent night's sleep in Grimmauld Place and add revising on top of that then let me know how refreshed you feel.” Hermione huffed as she rolled her eyes and dropped her arms from the younger witches neck before settling back against the wall. 

“Besides, shouldn’t you be in class right now?”

“It’s lunch time, I was hoping Harry and Ron would be done by the time I walked down to the Great Hall, but it seems you’re the only one done so far so I guess I’m waiting.”

Ginny shifted from her squatting position, twisting to fit herself into the space next to Hermione with a grin before looping her arm through other girl’s. 

“So I have a question for you that I didn’t want to put in a letter.”

“Oh Merlin. Tell me why I feel this is a question I’m not going to want to answer if you wanted me in person?”

Ginny raised an eyebrow and smirked slightly before shrugging nonchalantly. “Well Hermione that all depends on you. So I happened to see a very sweet hug between you and a certain Marauder on your birthday and what I want to know is when did you fall for Sirius and why haven’t you told me about it?”

The ginger witch pouted, her bottom lip poked out a little too far as her eyes danced with mirth. 

Hermione sputtered for a moment as she recalled the flash of red hair she'd seen that night and cursed herself for not realizing it was Ginny who was far too observant for her own good. 

“I… I haven’t fallen for Sirius. We’re just friends and he’d given me a really beautiful gift. I couldn’t not hug him, it would have been rude.”

Sighing as Ginny snatched her wrist to push up her sleeve, she let her head fall back against the stone wall with a thud. Ginny ran her fingers over the bracelet gently, her head cocked and eyes narrowed in Hermione’s direction. 

“You’re going to sit here and tell me that this is a bracelet from a man who just sees you as a friend? I don’t give two hippogriff shits if it’s ‘something he had lying around’, just because that man hates his family doesn’t mean he wouldn’t want to see a family heirloom on your wrist. Come on Hermione, you’re not obtuse.”

Pulling her wrist back, she twisted the bracelet a few times, a habit she’d developed over the last few weeks and resisted the urge to stomp her foot. 

“Sirius is a very handsome man, but there are so many other witches he could want. Someone closer in age or prettier or I don’t know, but there is no Sirius and I and there will be no Sirius and I.” _As much I would like there to be_ , she thought bitterly shoving the sleeve of her shirt back down. 

Ginny held her hands up in supplication and sighed loudly before tossing her hair over her shoulder. “You say that now, but we’ll see.”

Hermione opened her mouth to protest but the door opened and a parade of students were herded out the doors led by Harry and Ron, the former who scooped his girlfriend up and twirled her as Hermione and Ron shared a look. 

“Oi, some of us would like to keep our appetites. Seeing you two all lovey dovey puts me off and you know I get cranky if I don’t eat.”

Linking her arm through Ron’s to distract him from the enthusiastic snogging happening behind them. 

“Come on Ronald. Let’s get you fed before you wilt away.”

\--

**October 31st, 1998**

The week between N.E.W.Ts and results was nerve wracking enough for Hermione to want to drink the days away and she found herself in the library with a glass of firewhiskey dangling from her fingers most nights. Sirius and Harry both would come and join her when they were free, but now that Harry was done with tests, most of his free time was taken up by the Aurors. 

Most often Sirius would come home from the Leaky Cauldron, shed his outer wardrobe and drop onto the couch next to Hermione before pulling her feet into his lap and helping himself to a glass or three of Ogden’s Finest. 

The morning of halloween dawned overcast and gloomy which she wasn’t sure bode well for their first visit to Godric’s Hollow since she and Harry were nearly taken out by Nagini, but she was, well happy wasn’t the right word, but she was more than willing to join Sirius and Harry as they both had a difficult evening ahead of them. 

Slipping downstairs and into the kitchen, she puttered about filling the tea kettle with water and tapping it with her wand before summoning the bread and a jar of jam Molly had sent over a few days prior in the hopes that eating something would calm her frayed nerves. 

Settling in at the table with a mug and her toast, she pulled the Daily Prophet across the table where Sirius had discarded it and scanned the front page, scoffing slightly at the mention of Harry on a run to the apothecary, as if that were really front page news and wondering not for the first time whether the Prophet was actually Witch Weekly in disguise. 

She’d very nearly gotten a bite of her toast when the tapping at the window caught her attention. Recognizing the eagle owls the Ministry used, she squealed and yanked the window open, waving the owl towards the toast with a dismissive hand as she snatched the letters from his talons, dropping Harry’s on the table with a flourish. The owl perched on the edge of a chair and nibbled at the bread while managing to give Hermione a look of pure and utter disdain. 

Staring at the envelope in her hand, she bit her bottom lip for a moment, hesitating. Without a second thought she rushed to the floo and called out The Leaky Cauldron before stepping in, her breakfast, and the owl, forgotten. 

Popping out of the floo, she waved the letter in the direction of the bar and took a deep breath to steady herself. 

“Sirius! It’s here!”

Looking wildly around the pub she found herself thankful it was nearly empty as she realized in her haste to leave she was still in Sirius’s old Quidditch jersey, a pair of shorts and house slippers, wondering if this would be tomorrow’s headline instead of Harry’s grocer runs. 

Her teeth found her bottom lip again as the wizard in question crossed the floor from where he’d been behind the bar. 

“Well, what did you get? Let me guess, ten N.E.W.Ts?”

“I haven’t opened it. I don’t think I can. Will you do it?”

She thrust the letter towards him, her teeth worrying her bottom lip and Sirius tamped down the urge to pull Hermione into his arms, instead pulling the letter from her fingers. 

“Are you sure you want me to?”

She inclined her head, her curls falling into her face as she whispered, “I know I can, but the thought of what could be in there makes me want to crawl into Kreacher’s Den. Please?”

Chuckling quietly he slid a finger under the wax seal and pulled the parchment out eyes scanning the page. He licked his lips and flicked the page before speaking. 

“Miss Hermione Granger, we are pleased to present you with your results of your Nastily Exhausting Wizarding Tests and would like to remind you of what constitutes as a pass or fail-”

“Sirius please!”

“Alright, love, calm down. You’ll be happy to know you are the proud owner of eight N.E.W.Ts with Os in Transfiguration, Potions, Arithmancy, Charms, Muggle Studies, Herbology and Ancient Runes and Exceeds in Defense.” He passed her the letter back and wrapped her into a hug, planting a kiss onto the riotous mass of curls. 

“I told you not to fret, didn’t I? You’re gonna kick arse at the Ministry, those stuffy purebloods won’t know what hit them.” He leaned in, his breath tickling her ear as he whispered, “You also look better in that shirt than I ever did.”

She felt the blush spread across her cheeks and she pushed his chest lightly so she could clear her senses of his overwhelming smell, ignoring the warmth that spread across her body. . 

“Thank you for everything you’ve done over the last few weeks. You could have let me starve, you didn’t need to feed me.”

“Of course I did, can’t let a pretty witch go out like that on my watch.” He winked. 

“I should, uh, probably go home and get ready but I’ll see you later to go to Godric’s Hollow, yeah?”

His eyes darkened slightly, but before she could say anything, they’d gone back to his normal gray. “I’ll meet you and Harry and we can apparate together. I’m going to let Hannah have the floor on her own tonight, I figure she can handle it.”

“Perfect, I’ll-” She paused and stretched a hand between them to tuck a strand of hair behind his ear that had fallen against his temple before she could catch herself. Blushing again she pulled her hand back and twisted her fingers in the jersey. “I’ll see you in a bit. Bye!”

She turned and nearly threw herself into the floo, leaving a bemused Sirius in her wake. 

\--

Sirius found himself staring at the floo, cursing himself for the feelings that seemed determined to grow despite his best efforts to shove them back into their little box. Though, he supposed if he were really trying to ignore them he’d go out and try to find a witch or two to drown his sorrows in, but that didn’t hold the same appeal to him anymore. 

Not when he had a witch in front of him who was so utterly perfect in every way but completely untouchable. No one could accuse him of not being a masochist at this point, but he knew all too well he had no leg to stand on when it came to his defense. 

A throat cleared behind him and he jumped, turning to find himself face to face with a blonde witch whose features held a smirk that let him know he was definitely in for a lot of questions. 

“So Sirius. That was quite a moment you and Hermione just had. Have you told Harry you’re in love with his best friend yet?”

He scoffed, scrunching his nose as he waved her off. “I’m not in love with Hermione. She just wanted someone to read her results for her and clearly I’m the obvious choice since Harry isn’t around.”

Hannah rolled her eyes and steepled her fingers in front of her face, her eyebrows knitting together. “I wasn’t talking about you telling her her results Sirius Black and you know it! But you know what? Don’t tell me, it’s fine. Just know when I start the betting pool, I demand insider information.”

She moved to greet a customer, leaving Sirius to collect himself. Had Hermione been flirting with him? No, she wouldn’t be flirting with him, not if she had men like Oliver Wood after her. Though, Sirius knew that she hadn’t gone on any dates after she and Ron had broken up so there could be a chance… but not one he would take because he wasn’t going to tie her down to an old man with his best days behind him. 

He shook his head, realizing he was starting to sound like Moony before Tonks had dragged him out of his furry little funk. Maybe he should rethink going out on dates. 

\--

As dusk fell, Sirius joined Hermione at Grimmauld, his hip leaning against the kitchen counter top and a tumbler of firewhiskey in his hand as Hermione sipped her tea and waited for Harry to pop through the flames. As if summoned, Harry tumbled out onto the hearth and shook soot from his robes with a grin. 

“Nearly seven years of flooing and I’m still absolute pants at it. Should probably just count that one as a loss if I’m honest.”

Hermione snorted into her teacup while Harry shed his auror robes ungracefully, draping them over the back of a kitchen chair. Sirius set his glass down in the sink before clapping his hands together and straightening up. 

“Alright, we ready to go? From what I hear, Halloween is still a big thing in Godric’s Hollow and might be a bit busy.”

Hermione banished her tea cup to the sink and unfolded from her chair. “Ready as I’ll ever be. Thank you both for letting me join you.”

Harry leaned against the table, his hands bracing his body weight as he gave a halfhearted grin. “I think after the disaster of last Christmas, I want to experience this with the both of you while we’re not in imminent danger.”

The two followed Sirius out onto the front stoop, the door closing behind them with a dull thud. In quick succession, three quiet cracks of apparition rang out as they disappeared from the stoop and reappeared in front of what was left of Potter Cottage. Hermione linked her arms through Sirius and Harry’s, tightening her grip slightly to keep steady. She watched Harry as he took in the house, his body tense. She knew the anniversary would be harder on him than Christmas had been, but there wasn’t anywhere else she’d rather be, despite the fact that there were clusters of people scattered about ogling the trio and whispering amongst themselves. 

She felt Sirius arm tighten around hers and she could see a muscle in his jaw twitch from how hard he was clenching. This was their night though, so she would be there to offer whatever comfort she could. 

Another crack of apparition had the three turning as one, taking in the sight of Remus in his coat. Instinctively, Hermione dropped Sirius’ arm, letting the two last Marauders lead the way to the cemetery and passed the monument which had a small crowd of people clustered around it. 

Hermione conjured a wreath of white roses to lay against the headstone once they’d made their way into the cemetery, laying the flowers down gently before stepping back to let the three men have their time. The three men before her created quite a tableau with Remus standing tall, a hand against Harry’s shoulder as he kneeled on the ground before the headstone. Sirius’ hand rested atop the marble, his other tucked deep into his pocket, though she could see it was clenched into a tight fist. 

Her heart ached for her boys and though Remus had his own family, Hermione counted him amongst her collection of strays, a pang in her chest that these two men were both still so lost even if they hid it well. Harry had stopped trying to hide it, at least within the confines of Grimmauld Place as he worked through the trauma’s he’d experienced over his short eighteen years of life and this night especially was still rough for him. Standing so close to where it had all ended and where the course of so many lives were changed was a heavy weight upon their chests, but the healing, while slow, was happening and Hermione reveled in seeing the changes it brought for Harry, Sirius and Remus most of all. 

She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, fiddling with a loose string on the hem of her sweater and lost herself in her own thoughts, reflections passing her by with the rustle of the leaves as they fell from whispers of wind that whistled through the branches. She was amazed at how things felt so different from where they were just five months earlier, but while her nightmares were still just as vivid as the day they’d started, even within herself she could feel a shift, like a changing of tides. 

Movement caught her eye and she focused on the men in front of her as Harry extended his hand without looking away from the engraved words in front of him. Wordlessly stepping forward, she slipped her hand into his, letting him hold it tight as he used his free hand to swipe at his eyes. Another hand snaked down her forearm, fingers entwining with hers as Sirius closed the distance between them, bringing Hermione into their tableau completely. 

Sirius shifted, settling his weight on his heels as he took comfort in the warmth of the small hand within his own. He knew it was selfish to take this moment for himself, knowing he could never ask more of her but for just one moment, he wanted to be selfish. To ignore his own grief, his own burdens and just tell his friend Prongs about a woman who finally made him want to settle down and be the man he never thought he had it in him to be. 

Unsure of how long he stood there, he sighed quietly as Harry pushed himself up from the ground and dropped Hermione’s hand before turning to embrace Remus who’d let his hand drop from Harry’s shoulder. None of them could deny that they needed this. It wasn’t closure, there wouldn’t ever really be closure, but it was enough for now. Enough to remind them that while they had all lost so much, they still had the chance to live and honor the ones who’d already left them. 

He squeezed Hermione’s hand, almost unwilling to let her go before taking a steadying breath, a roguish grin upon his lips. “I think that we should all go get some Chinese food and tell Harry and Hermione here embarrassing stories from our youth. What say you Moony?”

“I think we can scrounge up a few they’ve never heard before. And some fried rice sounds particularly appetizing right now. You two in?”

Harry and Hermione shared a look before both shrugging. Harry snorted quietly, “Let’s go feed you heathens.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i appreciate all the kudos and comments! your feedback means the world to me!


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